Is it normal that i want my daughter to abort her baby

You'd think since you did the same thing you'd have some compassion. Perhaps she can teach her child not to follow the family motto of getting pregnant while still being a child.

Yes it's normal, but really you should let your daughter decide. I know she's only 15 but if she wants to keep the baby then you should support her.

How do you feel about being a grandparent in your twenties?

It's normal because abortion is a way to "get rid of the problem". She'll hate you for it in the end, and will question why it was ok for you to have her as a kid, but she can't do the same thing? If you're old enough to have sex, you're old enough to face the consequences. Don't be a coward - your daughter is trying to be mature and accept the consequences. Perhaps adoption is the best thing for this unborn child, but abortion is not the solution.

Yes she should abort the baby , don't listen to the people against abortion they're stupid

i think you should talk to her, explain in detail about how it will affect her life, but you cant make her have an abortion. its her choice of whether she wants it or not. best of luck :)

It's understandable because your scared and want to protect your daughter. But as her mother you must support her in what she chooses to do!! You say your parents were monsters, and if you tell her that you want her to abort her baby, she is going to think your a monster too. Just support her give her your advice about raising the baby, be there for her and her boyfriend. :) a baby can be a wonderful thing :) good luck being a grandma!!

She needs your support so be there for her and don't influence her decision.

She is 15 and like it or not, right or wrong she is old enough to make a reasoned decision... providing she has all the facts, and I mean ALL.

As a parent you need to balance up the potential for emotional damage either way. It's no good living with regrets, interesting how the pattern has repeated itself isn't it?

Also if she does keep it, don't assume that she will screw up her life, she can screw up yours instead by making you the stand in 'parent'.

If you are worried you don't have the information to give her, and can't tell her in the right way, most doctors will offer a counsellor for a situation like this.

For one thing, you need to be honest with her. Tell her about how having a child young will affect her. It may seem harsh to her, but someone needs to give her a wake up call, because at 15, no one is mature to have a kid.

Tell her your opinion, but make it known that she doesn't have to do anything if she doesn't want too.

But know this, someone I know got pregnant at 16, she thought it through and decided to have an abortion, because she knew she wasn't ready to have a kid and knew it would screw with her life. It scarred her though. Having an abortion will hurt you a lot emotionally.

All valid things were said but I can't help to think that she won't do any supporting to that baby. She's 15. She lives under your roof. You're gonna pay for everything and I think it's extremely unfair to you. I think you're right to think that way. If she was older and could support herself with the person she had the baby with, I'd say no.

I'm 100% dead set against abortion, get help, put the baby up for adoption anything but abortion.

No offense but it was her fault, not the babie's.
I blame society and stupidity.

I don't think anyone is truly ready to have a child, some people just have to grow up faster than others. You need to accept that it is your daughter's choice, and as a parent you should let her be independent as a person and a future mother.

First of all I think by telling her to abort the baby is pretty much the same thing as telling her she's a mistake and you wish you would have aborted her. I mean. Isn't that what you're saying? That should make her feel good.

I think you should talk to her about all of the options and your expectations for each option. You can talk to her about abortion and expected outcomes. Talk to her about adoption and what could come of that. That could be a great choice. If she wants to have it, tell her your expectations there. She's going to need to get a job, stay home on weekends, etc. Be honest and supportive and stand behind what you tell her. Ultimitely it's her decision and hold her accountable for whatever she chooses.

It's normal to want to, but don't do it.

Has anyone seen my comment about adoption ?! It like 300 words.

All I can say is express your concerns to her, but don't push your choice of her. It is her choice after all. I got pregnant and had a baby at the age of 18, not as young, but it did make a lot of changes in my life happen. I am now married to her dad, we have 3 beautiful children together, and I am currently attending college. Having the baby may put a delay on her education, but it's not going to stop her life. If one of my daughters were to come to me at that age and tell me they were pregnant, I would support them in their decision and make the best of it. I've also had an abortion, and I fully regret it to this day and kick myself in the butt everyday for it. I am not against abortions, yet not for them either, I think it depends on the situation. Just support her and let her decide for herself.

It's her choice at the end of it all not yours and if she ever does regret it, it will be on her head not yours. You may want All these other things for her, but she ultimately makes her own choices at the end of the day. Educate her on ALL her choices - abortion included. She will have to learn to make important adult decisions if she wishes to bring another life into this world.

Abortion has its consequences too. It might seem the easy solution but have u thought this might affect her emotionally and also could she cope with the guilt? I know some people who've had abortions who feels so bad for doing it she had mental issues for years after.

You can suggest that she put the baby up for ADOPTION if you believe she is not ready! But never suggest abortion! That is murder and she will regret that decision for the rest of her lives! And allow her to make that decision on whether she wants to keep her baby on not and support her decision! She is not you!!!

its is not your opionion that she should abort her child. if she wants to keep it and cant live with the fact of killing her baby then you should fully suport her. just because life might get hard if she keeps the baby doesnt mean she should abort it to make life easier. and your basically saying that if you had the option to abort your daghter then you wouldve and that she only a mistake that madr your life hard. and you can get a job with a baby, get your GED or whatever and everything else. being a parent doesnt stop you and you obviously made it with both you and your daughter even having her at 13 and alone so she could do it at 15 with the suport of her family,you,her bf, and her bf's family.

She is 15 and pregnant. I'd be less concerned about aborting that baby, and more concerned about how I failed as a parent

I knew someone who go pregant at the same age and decided to get a abortion now she is successful and she is high up in the state level. I think it's really up to the daughter but abortion really isn't a completly bad idea

Adoption

Let's see, to me the punch line ITS HER BABY so in saying that IT'S HER DECISION MAKE NOT YOURS so my advice if she decides to go ahead with having her child, your role would be to support and guide your child. Remember you may house her body, but her soul is not yours!

it's normal to have your own views on the topic, but you still have to give her the choice. something a lot of people don't do these days.

I'd let her make her own desision. She may only be 15, but its still her life, and its too big a desision to try and force her do what you think is best. Sure, you can give her advice, but in the end she has to know that it is all her own choice.

maybe it would motivate her to do better if she had a reason to keep going forward with her life

my friend had a child at that age. the father didn't stick around. she didn't get any GCSE'S as far as i'm aware, and her family were supportive of the idea. she tells me often that she doesn't regret having the baby, but she wishes that she had waited. her life is ruined. she can't get a job, or start college, due to her lack of GCSE's.
but at the same time, that baby is beautiful. and she has made my friend so grateful for her... the world is harsh. have a future, or have something to love forever.

I don't know if it's normal, but I don't think you're wrong for wanting your daughter's baby aborted. I mean, that kid is probably going to do nothing but cause a ton of stress and ruin your lives, and at 15, they're probably not ready to handle that. I'm also not a baby lover in general, and I think the world would be a better place if more were aborted, just saying.

Here's what you do: First, go and get yourself an M67 grenade. Then, take your daughter, her boyfriend, and yourself and lock the three (four) of you in a very small room. Lastly, pull the pin on the grenade, and wait for 5 seconds. I really think that would be the best solution, and cheaper than an abortion.

a mum in my teens a gran in my twenties if this child turns out to be a girl im having her newtered there is no way in hell that im gonna be a great gran in my fourties no chance in hell. ill sen her to a convent or something

Abortion is wrong!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS WORLD??!!

Oh and sorry, I just read the rest of your comments, didn't see them. Obviously not your fault. I'm sorry that happened to her. My friends have had them, very scarring. Good for you for leaving those things out for her. I was just upset, this reminds me so much of that time in my own life.

***Right thing to do "at the time". Sorry. She needs to get a job and pay for herself for a while, then she'll realize how hard it is to pay for 2 people. Babies are expensive as hell.

I was pregnant at 14 after my first time having sex and forced by my mother to have an abortion, didn't have sex for the next 2 1/2 years and now after another 3 years of being in a great relationship, I'm so glad I had it. I wasn't ready, the guy who knocked me up was a 22 year old deadbeat and even now, even though I wanted to keep my baby at the time, I'm so glad I got the abortion. Now, if I got pregnant, I would give it up for adoption. But my question to you, as the mother, is why the fuck didn't you give your girl some fucking condoms?? She should have learned from your experience, not repeated it. :P let her abort or adopt, or let the baby stay a few nights crying and waking her up (make sure she goes to school every day) and she'll realize she's not ready. My roomate has a newborn, makes me feel like i'm a mom. Ugh no, even at 19 I'm too young. Your the parent, make the right choice. In very thankful to my mother for what she did, and sorry if you all hate me for saying all this, but it was the right thing to do.

Yes and no. It's normal to want the best for your daughter- and as you clearly know, THIS IS NOT IT. I think having a child young (and I mean anyone under 22) is a HUGE mistake. However, abortion is a big deal and it's not the ony solution. I would encourage her to look for a stable foster family who can provide this child with what it needs. Make sure she understands that SHE CANNOT DO THAT- love is soooo much, but it's not enough.

Now do you know how your parents felt ?

ALSo I have a family member who had a back alley abortion. She. REGRETS it and she's not able to have kids let her give the baby up for ADOPTION.

If he's 19 she's 15 that's stragetory rape He shouldn't be plowing his tractor with a girl that young illegal

Adoption is an Option. They have open adoptions where the birth mother/parents picks out the parents meets them and can have contact with them. And I Am Adopted. And I'm glad my birthmother let me live she's young and. Tv says you should keep it let's face it it's gonna be hard for the kid. She doesn't have a car a job not a high school diploma she should give the baby a. Mom
And a father I think. It's selfish people think they will have a baby together and they split up and me personally. I don't like sharing a boyfriend with an ex gf who's had his baby it's a pet peeve most of em keep it so they have reason to keep a man in their life I think it's selfish and wrong. If the guy didn't want you then and now ure having his kid. Obviously he isn't gonna want you with his kid he doesn't love you and hes not gonna marry u save yourself the heartache and get over the guy and not think about yourself put the baby before your own desires. Having a kid is expensive when your 15 money doesn't grow on trees and if she was my kid I'd be hell no if u were 18 that be different but your fifteen. U can't have this baby You are goin to give up for Adoption

for any1 whos wondering her bf is 19 nearly 20

whatever was your first instinct THAT is the right choice, NEVER second guess your gut

She really wouldn't be in this situation if you had educated her enough not to make the same mistake you made ie having a baby too young. Don't blame her - blame yourself.

no what the hell dont kill it give it up for adoption so at least the baby can have a futcher with people that are ready but maby cant,then she can she them but go on in life with out the trouble of school and a kid.please make the rite chouse.god bless.

in your position I'd feel the same way. Does she really understand yet how this will affect her for the rest of her life? It will completely derail her education with knock-on effects on her job opportunities and financial situation. What about her boyfriend? Does it really seem likely that they're ready to make an 18-year commitment to raise a child together? All children deserve to be truly wanted, not to be brought into the world because of someone's stupid mistake and subsequent guilt.

Adoption, abortion is not humane and it's wrong, there are plenty of families that want to adopt, including me.. Talk to your local adoption agency.

if she has the baby it would put stress on you, shes your daughter and you put her in the world, youve been in that situation, you have plenty good reasons for that to be normal.. youre just worried for your baby

I see and hear this all the time and it makes me so sad. I think you should drop your daughter into the real world asap. Find a young mum in your area and send your daughter to stay with her for a week - to help the girl out! The girl won't have much money, or a car to get about, or a night's sleep, or a social life, and more than likely the boyfriend has disappeared too. Then ask her if this is the life she wants or would she consider the other options. She is living in cloud cuckoo land at the moment all full of romantic notions! OMG!

I was 32 when I had my son and I am surprised every day that my husband and I are still sane.

Wowzeers....