Is it normal that i won't go anywhere uninvited?

73% Normal
8 Comments

I am married. My parents live 20 mins away from me... My sister about the same...

I never go to visit them or any of my friends unless I am invited. I will never ask them if it's ok for me to drop by or whatever either. Is this normal?

I think I may have a fear of rejection or something? But really, I just hate interfering and bothering people, as I don't want to come across as if I am interfering in their life or whatever?

Voting Results
73% Normal
Based on 59 votes (43 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • Anime7
    10 years ago

    As polite as that is, it could be perceived as a lack of wanting to visit your family or friends. Thus, there is a potential that they would feel unloved.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      That is exactly what is happening :(

      But I can't seem to get over my fear of rejection/interferance or whatever it is :(

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      • Anime7
        10 years ago

        I can sort of understand where you're coming from. I think you should at least tell these people that you love their company. Rejection is scary, asking someone to hang and be said no to can be bad. But think of it like this, if they're busy and can't hang, that doesn't mean they don't love you, it's just that they're busy. If you want to keep your family and friends then I think you're gonna have to push back the fear and force yourself to call these people and ask to hang. Tell them how much you love them.

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  • Aub
    10 years ago

    I feel that way because I'm terrified of inconveniencing people that I like.

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  • Gentil
    10 years ago

    Yep, it's definitely fear of rejection, I do have that a little too. What you could do is, while in conversation, slowly walk towards that subjet of getting to see each other, visiting their home,etc, and see how they react to that, and with that slowly growing confidence about saying it more directly.

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  • Runswithscissors
    10 years ago

    Yeah, I do the exact same thing for exactly the same reason.
    Fear of rejection.

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  • kittykat9930
    10 years ago

    Oh my god, I have this problem too and I hate it! When I'm at my boyfriend's place, I prefer it if he asked me to do something or go out somewhere first. And I prefer it if someone would message or text me before I would them, especially if I really care about that person. With my friends, I normally don't like to ask them to hang out. Same for my family. But I know it's because I'm too scared to be rejected or feel even more unwanted. :( It's not totally taking over my life though but it's enough to make some people feel like I don't care.

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  • Avant-Garde
    10 years ago

    That's very polite of you.

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