Is it normal that my face looks different to me all the time?
I have this weird conflict with myself where I believe I am beautiful yet ugly at the same time. I am a conventionally attractive 19 year old girl. I get complimented all the time and even went viral on tiktok multiple times strictly for my looks. I know deep down that I am attractive or I would not be validated to much. Yet I find myself hiding my face as soon as a camera is out. Every time my friends take pictures of me I look awful. I refuse to snapchat anyone with my full face and I am constantly seeking validation because I feel that I am ugly and everyone is lying to me. I often fantasize how I would look if I had plastic surgery but I can’t tell my friends because I am conventionally attractive enough to where they would think I’m fishing. I always think I am the hottest in the room and also the ugliest. I feel like I am arrogant and insecure all at once. My face looks different to me almost every day. It is constantly changing and deforms itself unless I am dolled up then I am perfect. Is this normal?