Is it normal to be banned from church for having sex before marriage?

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7 Comments

My now ex-boyfriend is the son of two non-denominational pastors who started a "nontraditional Christian church" in a renovated Ivan Smith building. They hoped that the humble atmosphere would reach the needier (homeless, addicts, prostitutes, etc.) members of the community better. When his parents found out that we were having sex, they asked that I not attend church that week. After a month of waiting, my then-boyfriend was told that we needed to break up for the sake of their family. I've been told not to go back to church there more than once. I understand their anger to a certain degree, but we had been together for almost a year before breaking the seal, and we were both 17 when this occurred.

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24% Normal
Based on 46 votes (11 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • suckonthis9
    11 years ago

    Why are they creating division in society? Ask them.

    If they ask you to come back, tell them that you'd like to do a live sex show for them in church, because you feel that they were jealous they didn't get to watch last time!

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  • dappled
    11 years ago

    Some humans convert their human insecurities into "values" which are attributed to religions. One, in particular, is the insecurity that other people are having more fun (i.e. sex) than you are. It makes people act badly. They try to punish the person they think is more sexually attractive or is having more fun. It eats them up and they lash out. When this insecurity spills into a doctrine, it can lead to all kinds of unpleasantness (such as smashing off women's clitorises with a brick and sewing their vaginas up so they can't have sexual pleasure as a worst case scenario still practiced today). I'm not blaming religion for this, by the way. It's the work of people. I personally believe religion is invented by people but I respect that other people don't. Either way, I'm not lambasting religion. Just people and their insecurity. It's the reason for a lot of bad behaviour including, I believe, what has happened to you.

    You haven't done anything wrong. If other people would like to limit your enjoyment of life and then use their power and influence to control you (even saying it's the word of God), I think they're pretty sick individuals.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    You're going to the wrong church and he's the wrong boyfriend for you just let go and move on with your life.

    These people are hypocrites.

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  • 1000yrVampireKing
    11 years ago

    Wow I have never heard of anyone getting banned.

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  • cupcake_wants
    11 years ago

    They are hipocrites bcuz judging is a 'sin' . theyre more worried about the hookers and YOU are banned??! doesnt make much sense to me!

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    11 years ago

    I think your ban from church was more of a ban to keep you away from the family who feels that their reputation would suffer and don't want that there. It's probably more a ban from them than the church itself

    While I don't doubt that a church will "ban" you if your bedroom behavior is starting to affect life outside of the bedroom to a noticeable degree, I haven't seen it happen save for severe circumstances (multiple affairs, child abuse and neglect and general poor behavior). Your boyfriend being so closely related to pastors who had an image to keep probably hurt you more than anything. It's a shame, yeah, but it happens.

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  • prasatko
    11 years ago

    Religion poisons everything.

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