Is it normal to be in a situation like this with your teacher?

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28 Comments

Well, I am just going straight to it. :) Background: I am pretty close to a teacher, and we are having the “love and hate” thing going on. We insult each other, and we call each other names. This has been going on for quite some time already. He was the one that started this whole thing; well I guess it is kind of obvious, since a student usually does not have the courage to do so. Now we have only one week of school left, and couple days ago he talked to me about it. He said I was going too far, pushing it too much, and that I just crossed the line! (Everything was normal that day, so I was confused, I did not know where it all came from.) I have to admit that I was frustrated and hurt. I was not the one that started this and that if he felt like I crossed the line, this conversation would not be happening at the time it happened. (Trust me, I had done worse things.) I felt like I had to do something because I hurt his feelings. I decided to write him an apology letter; I put it on his desk on my way out. He came over to my next period and asked that teacher if he could speak with me. I was really scared, in fact, horrified. The other teacher thought it was a huge deal; he thought something really serious was happening. He apologized, and he thought we were ok. He is, but I am not. So afterwards, I decided to go back to “confront” him. I asked him why he told me (first time) at such a weird time, he said he is having problems with his family, and that I probably said something that ticked him off. Then I asked why did he apologize, (it does not happen every day.) he told me he knew he hurt my feeling. (I shut up in his class for two days following the primary conversation. He tried to make conversations, but I was really confused so I just did not talk back since he wanted me to shut up.) It ended pretty weird, and I don’t really know why. I thought we were ok, but I guess there will always be that gap in between now.
Thanks for reading the whole thing, I am really frustrated right now, your advices will be greatly appreciated.

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30% Normal
Based on 114 votes (34 yes)
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Comments ( 28 )
  • Selena
    13 years ago

    My english teacher tells me his life story he's like a freaking pedo I'm like I DONT CARE!!! I'm glad schools done for the summer

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  • dmslax
    13 years ago

    If I were you I would take a step back and let the teacher just be a teacher. He needs someone he can talk to about his issues and you are not the appropriate person.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    he deff. is attracted to you and hes just confused on how to take this upon his life. It sucks! he likes you a lot to much to where he does not even know how to act anymore. .

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    • elvalil
      13 years ago

      I guess so. Thanks for your comment:)

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  • somethingsomething
    13 years ago

    I had some conflicts with my teacher, too. We talk a lot and once I'd made up that he's a superhero, and he thought that was hilarious and crazy. I'd made a comic book about it and wanted to give it to him at the end of the year as a gift from the whole class because the class had a huge role in making up the story, but he turned very awkward and said he didn't want to talk to me anymore and I should leave him alone. And so I did. Whenever I saw him on the train I ignored it and I never spoke during class. I was too proud of myself to apologise, but at the end I realised I was the one who'd done it wrong. A teacher is a teacher and no matter how you put it. I said I was sorry and I say nothing anymore.

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  • robynmere
    13 years ago

    You can only go forwards-to make it less awkward.

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    • elvalil
      13 years ago

      true. I ended up in his class again this year. Things are better now, at least on my side:)

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  • elvalil
    13 years ago

    Thanks:) I think I am just going to leave the problem there, time will wash everything away. Hopefully. haha

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  • Mel
    13 years ago

    Its an inappropriate relationship with a teacher. You shouldnt be that close, & or call each other names/or compliment each other all the time either. Sounds to me, you care too much. Hes a teacher, not a friend.

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    • elvalil
      13 years ago

      You are right about me, and I guess both of us are caring too much. Thanks, I don't know why I didn't realize this earlier. So I should keep my distance? Or should I just have no contact at all?

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  • peterrabbyt69
    7 years ago

    I sucked my teacher off and he sucked my cock too. It was great.

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  • Avant-Garde
    10 years ago

    1. What type of school are you in? High school or college?

    2. How old are you? How old were you when this started?

    3. Usually, student-teacher relationships are frowned upon but the rules on this depend on the school/where you live. Some schools will fire the teachers over relationships like this.

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  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago

    No.

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  • BTCHPLS
    11 years ago

    woah thats too fking long so i assume its bad, so its not normal

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  • SxcSara
    12 years ago

    You obvessly like this teacher, and he obvessly likes you. he probz wants to be with you but doesnt no how to tell you. i think you should tell him how you feel and brake the ice. go for it hunni. it is so exciting dating your teacher. just keep it quite, you dont want people finding out xxx

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  • Tehboss
    12 years ago

    leave teh man alone have you no shame you home wrecker leave brit... cough... your teacher alone he has problems too you know?

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    • elvalil
      12 years ago

      I am not doing anything. I am not trying to break anyone's family! I still talk to this teacher, and things are way better now. Even if I like him, I am not expecting anything from him. So calm down!

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  • AshTheBrat
    12 years ago

    i used to hate my english teacher, i thought she was a right cow at times.
    but i went to an intervention on a weekend, and she offered to drop me off at home. it was raining, the bus was taking forever, so i agreed. when i got in the car, she was playing a song i really like, which sparked a conversation. we talked about all kinds of stuff, and i felt like i'd known her for years. we get along in school really well now.
    so having close bonds with teachers is normal. and arguing with them is too.

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  • SarahWalker
    13 years ago

    I had that exact kind of relationship with my Spanish teacher in HS. We'd have fighting matches in class and later apologize to each other. It's just that you two are both going through frustrating situations in school and/or with family etc and you trust each other enough to let it out on each other. It is not necessarily appropriate but it is understandable.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Its not unusual to get emotionally entangled at a chummy-friendship level with someone who does have power over you. But it is never an equal relationship - student/teacher, employee/boss.

    Personally i have tried to avoid these relationships, even though it is difficult; and I usually feel unsettled with being the unequal when when that line is crossed into the personal.

    Your friends are your friends: equals. But many relationships aren't, especially school & work.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    ive just been through a different situation with my teacher but its come out the same way as yours...not knowing what to do whether to talk to her and theres that gap..even when people are mean to me she ignores it :( ..i tend to not talk or look at her untill she tells me to! x im sorry if i made it any worse! x

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    • elvalil
      13 years ago

      I am sorry to hear that!!:( I can totally relate! I hate it when that happens. Luckily, we worked it out. I think we both realized that not talking to each other is only enlarging the gap. I actually made the move, and we ended the year happily. He talked to me, and he said that he feels sorry for making me feel bad. I feel like the "fight" actually brought us closer.:) I think you should go to talk to your teacher, let her know how you feel:)

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  • randomjelly
    13 years ago

    He's married! Disgusting...have you no shame?

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    • elvalil
      13 years ago

      It's not like that...

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    I'm not sure it's normal to be that close to a teacher but that's just me.

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    • elvalil
      13 years ago

      Now that I think about it , you are right. Compare to my other teachers, this is TOO MUCH. Haha thank you. So do you think I should try to get out of his class next year?

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Noo

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Normal. Been there done that!

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