Is it normal to be scared of cheating?

Is it normal I'm so scared of my boyfriend cheating on me? He's done it before but he says he's changed & everything but I just can't let the past go. It hurts to much. & I can't move on. I've tried so many times. It's gotten to the point I have nightmares about it. & I wake up crying. Or sweating. /: please help. Advice?

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80% Normal
Based on 74 votes (59 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • ProseAthlete

    Given that he's done it before, you have some reason to be fearful. It's bound to take you some time to heal and feel as though you can trust him again. If this happened recently, give yourself time to recover from a major blow to your ego and your trust.

    He also needs to work hard to regain that trust, but most of the work that needs doing is on you. I know that's unfair, considering he's the one who did wrong, but it's true. You still have the harder task in forgiving him than he has in being worthy of forgiveness.

    On the other hand, if the cheating happened a while ago and you still find yourself incapable of regrowing that trust, it might be time to move on. No relationship is worth sleepless nights and misery -- especially not if the relationship has already taken a big hit once. No one would think less of you if you decided the relationship wasn't worth the monumental effort it takes to learn to have faith in someone again.

    I'm sorry that happened to you.

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    • Mack_shaffer20

      Thank you so much. Deff gunna take this advice.

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  • squeallikeasacofpigs

    Omg, another sob story of a girl that got cheated on and took the asshole back. WRONG! Never forgive anyone that cheats, it will never be the same again. But if you really want to stay with him, you must accept your fate. Theres nothing you can do to stop him cheating on you. If he wants to do it, he will. Thinking about it won't change a thing. Accept your fate, deal with the reality that it's out of your hands.

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    • Tehboss

      and have sex with his best friend regardless :D

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  • RoseIsabella

    Once a cheater always a cheater! Take a hint from your subconscience mind and understand that you are in a crisis, a crisis that you have allowed to develop by continuing to stay with your so called boyfriend. You have nightmares that are so bad that you wake up screaming in a pool of sweat and crying for a reason! Stop trying to get past this hurt and accept that you are powerless over his cheating ways. And STOP being afraid of being alone, because that's probably the real problem here isn't it? Being lonely hurts but it's going to hurt a hell of a lot more when your scumbag boyfriend dumps you after he finds a new lay he likes better. You will feel a whole lots better if you do the dumping, trust me, I was there too when I was young.

    Sure, you might feel lonely and sad if you get rid of him but I'm willing to bet the nightmares will stop. Start working on loving and respecting yourself instead of trying to accept the unacceptable from someone who is not worth your, time, emotions and beauty rest!

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  • LizardSkin

    Once a cheater always a cheater. You weren't smart to stay with him. In fact, you just confirmed for him that he can cheat and still have you.

    If someone really loves you they won't cheat.

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  • Johnnytherat

    you should fear getting caught more than actually doing it ^_-

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  • DickwaffleTheGreat

    "He done it before" I am sorry but you are not clear in the head for taking him back.

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  • Sensate

    You should have never taken him back. Cheaters ussually don't change. They are either assholes who'll always be on the hunt and wont say no if they get an opportunity, or they rarely get any female attention and simply don't have the backbone to say no when some hot blonde offers. Either way, they aint to be trusted. Then again are you? Or haven't you been in a situation where there is a hard choice to make?

    I don't ussually bash the male race like this, but I know myself. I've never cheated, but I know how goddamn hard it can be to say no to some fun adventure.

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