Is it normal to be this terrified of being alone in a room?
Whenever I go into any room, my heartbeat speeds, I have to glance behind me every few seconds, and literally the smallest things or bits of motion that I MIGHT have seen startle me. At that point, I usually end up darting out of the room and back into a room full of other people; then I gradually get fine and can forget about it.
However, if I have to stay alone in a room for an extended amount of time, like more than 5 minutes, the terror gets worse to the point where I end up crying, shivering, and immobile. Whenever that happens, it feels almost like my mind is back to normal, because I end up thinking things like "Okay, now you're just doing this for show. STOP IT, and get back to what you were doing. This is ridiculous!" Because, it seems like in my head, I'm not nearly as afraid as my body is. And no matter how much I tell myself to stop or how much I try to get back to normal, I always end up either half-hunched over (as if protecting myself from something), curled into a ball on the floor, or back pressed flat against the wall until somebody finds me.
It's gotten to the point that I can't do ANYTHING alone. I need to sleep in the same room as my sister, and, embarrassing as it is, I need to have her in the same room when I take a shower, even though I force her to look the opposite direction. My own bedroom is pretty much unused anymore, as well. It's getting to the point where it's intruding into my life and it's REALLY irritating.
Please say I'm not the only one this happens to...?