Is it normal to fear the future after someone in your family has died?

92% Normal
2 Comments

It's seems that everything started when my brother was diagnosed with brain cancer back in 2013. At first, everything was going great, the treatment and medications were working and doctors gave us all high hopes. Things changed around mid 2014 when everything took a turn for the worst and the medication stopped working. I watched my brother go from a big healthy guy with ambitions and dreams to someone who at the end didn't even completely comprehend that he was dying because of how the cancer affected his brain and thinking. He died on October 2014 at the age of 18.

Since then it's seems like every single goal I had placed on myself have simply vanished. I'm currently in college doing my 3rd year and I've lost the motivation to give it my all. It's now just me and my parents and I can't stop thinking about what I'd do if I lost them too. From all this I've learned that life can be so unpredictable, you can be alive today and not be here tomorrow. This has affected me in so many ways that I'm honestly scared to even think about the future because I don't know if I'll be here to live through it, I'm scared I'm going to die too. My brother died at such a young age, so unexpectedly and really it can happen to anyone. I'm scared to live in such an unpredictable world but at the same time I fear to live an unfulfilled life because of my fear. Any advice? Is this normal?

Voting Results
92% Normal
Based on 37 votes (34 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 2 )
  • Ellenna
    8 years ago

    It's normal, but not healthy. You're still grieving, that's not even a year yet.

    You will die one day, you know, but you may need some specific bereavement counselling to stop this fear paralising your life.

    Maybe you could keep reminding yourself that your brother would want you to have a happy life even though he's gone

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    2
    2
  • thegypsysailor
    8 years ago

    Growing up under the threat of 'MAD" and nuclear annihilation, I completely get where you are coming from. We literally didn't know if we (or anybody on earth) would be alive the next day, through most of my teen years.
    Guess what? Most of us are still here and so is the world.
    There were never any guaranties before your brother passed (I'm sorry about that) and his passing hasn't changed the odds one bit for you.
    Just think of the many loves you'll have, maybe a wife and kids and the friends you'll make if you look forward and build a life.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0