Is it normal to feel like i'm going insane?

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3 Comments

Hi all sorry for an edgy-ass submission but I just wanted to see whether this is a normal occurance or not.

I've just recently turned 18 and for the past 6 years of my life I feel like my mentally health has deteriorated at a RAPID pace. I don't mean "oh i'm a little stressed because of school" i mean full on had daily breakdowns everyday with the following symptoms:
>Crushing pain in my heart that aches and causes stress
>Feeling of budding laughter even though everything hurts
>Frequent memory loss (I have notes of my personal details and parents names because i forget them on a daily basis)
>Hearing slamming/banging noises that seem to get louder and louder quickly? Like something is chasing you super fast and their stomping feet get closer to you
>Seeing bloody limbs in random places
>Having nightmares nightly. I don't remember the last time i didn't have a nightmare. All of them are extremely vivid and gory and i barely get any sleep because i'm terrified of them
>I'm always having to fight my own emotions to the point where I straight up talk in third person and scream at myself whenever i do something wrong
>I have no self esteem. Genuinly and utterly none.
>I have a really big want (which is too personal for me to say) but if i did it would make me hurt myself and/or others and for these past 6 years i've been holding it back. I don't know whether this is just something everyone goes through, though.

I'm just kind of concerned. I thought all of this would go away once my puberty ended but it ended when i was 16 and it's escalated even.

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64% Normal
Based on 11 votes (7 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • aparesarah
    5 years ago

    Also, it is normal to feel like you're going insane when you're dealing with all of these things! And that doesnt make you insane whaysoever. But know this- you are so strong for making it this far and your feelings are VALID. YOU are worth it. And because of that, you deserve happiness and to feel mentally okay. I hope you'll be able to get the help you deserve or be able to talk to someone openly about all of this.

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  • aparesarah
    5 years ago

    I just want to reach out and tell you that firstly, you are not alone. Second, I am so so sorry you are going through this. You're still young enough to try and get help before all of this gets worse, and I urge you strongly to do so. Not as a way to say you're insane or anything, but to help your mental health issues asap. My parents raised me to believe that mental health problems were all in my head and that medicine was the devil. When I went off to college, it got worse and worse. I had many of these same things happen, except I was seeing demonic figures everywhere and hearing voices. It may be a tiny bit of schizophrenia, but mine ended up being major depressive disorder, PTSD from abusive past relationships and childhood trauma, and extreme anxiety. I also struggle with extremely loud noises, like BANGS or POPs, and my doctor believes it's just a sensory overload thing that causes me to panic and make my anxiety worse.

    Please, if there's any way you could see someone to get help on this, you really should. It sounds like you have a chemical imbalance that needs medical attention. When you get on the right medication, it truly helps you be the person you're meant to be. Citalopram and Cymbalta have helped me so much in my early twenties. I'm thinking of you and if you ever need to vent, my inbox is always open. <3

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  • RoseIsabella
    5 years ago

    You probably need to see a psychiatrist.

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