Is it normal to hate misconceptions about depression??

94% Normal
18 Comments

Honestly it pisses me off when people misconstrue everything about Depression. You can't just go by whatever you hear. Don't know the facts? Don't know how it feels? Don't speak about it.

Let's get shit straight & like it is.

1. "You're attention seeking. Stop being dramatic. You'll get over it. Move on. You're just looking for pity."

We are NOT attention seeking. We are NOT dramatic. Eventually in time we WILL get through it. It's not that easy to "move on" when the situation is still ongoing, you live in it every day; etc. We are NOT looking for no-fucking-body's pity, sympathy or whatever.

Let's make this shit clear. Depressed is not "sad". Depression is not an episode we are having. Depression was never asked for. Depression is not something you can just fucking turn off & turn on when you want to. Depression should not be belittled or underestimated.

We didn't just fucking wake up from under a rock & say "Hey, let me be really depressed, forget what it feels like to be happy, become antisocial, contemplate suicide, & so on."

Be mindful, there are people out there who don't have the same circumstances as everyone else.

Now none of this means that depressed people are depressed all the time. We can have our moments when we want to have a good time & make jokes with friends & so on. But then it's like a never-ending cycle that just goes around & around.

I will not say that I have it worse than anyone else out there. People have the same situation & WORSE than I do. I've been through it all. Point is you don't know my struggle. You don't know ANYONE'S struggle. You'll never know anything until you've dealt with all the shit we have. This shit ain't a joke.

There is a lot more I'd say on this topic but moral of the story is it IS an ILLNESS that needs to be taken seriously. Don't try & belittle a person or make them feel like a burden for what they've gone through & are going through. If you stepped in my shoes or their shoes we'd all love to see how you would've made it & if you didn't end up like us or worse. & don't make us out to be weak individuals that can't handle the "real world" & how you've gone through your toughest of tough & made it out okay. If you truly have then hey, good for you. But understand not everybody can handle things the same way. You may think & feel that way but everyone's ain't like that.

Voting Results
94% Normal
Based on 63 votes (59 yes)
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Comments ( 18 )
  • dappled
    11 years ago

    Like charli.m says, I think it's difficult for people to imagine how it feels so they just have a picture in their head of what it's like and that picture is often wrong. I've heard some astonishing things said to depressed people. A schoolfriend's husband asked her: "Why don't you just try being happier"? Jaw-dropping, isn't it?

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    • charli.m
      11 years ago

      I thought you were howaminotmyself for a second :)

      That "just be happier" really fucks me off...

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      • dappled
        11 years ago

        Gah! I know. It's like saying to someone with kidney failure, "C'mon, stop messing around and make your kidneys work normally". I'm not sure why people think the brain or chemicals in it are magically self-healing when other organs obviously aren't.

        And I don't recall anyone accusing Stephen Hawking of being lazy.

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        • VioletTrees
          11 years ago

          Ehhh… I think I agree with the point you're trying to make, but it's really not true that people don't think that organs are magically self-healing. People say astonishing and invalidating things to physically disabled and physically chronically ill people, too. Here are some that I and some of my disabled friends have gotten:

          • "Just power through it."
          • "People with your condition run marathons, you know"
          • "You don't really NEED that, do you?" (about mobility aids)
          • "I don't like you taking medication."
          • "I get tired too."
          • "The only thing holding you back is yourself."
          • "If you'd just eat right and exercise, you'd get better."
          • "Have you tried yoga?" (How‽)
          • "My brother had that, but he decided to get better."
          • "It's all in your head."
          • "Do you even want to get better?"

          Of course, saying horrible, invalidating things about depression is just as bad as saying them about physical illnesses or disabilities (I'm speaking as someone who's physically disabled and has major depressive disorder). But don't expect people to be particularly reasonable or sensitive, just because a condition is physical (especially if it's invisible).

          As for Stephen Hawking, people may not call him lazy, but that might be because they're too busy crowbarring him into other destructive tropes. See the following article:
          http://disabledtalk.tumblr.com/post/19972659050/the-super-crip-stereotype-press-victimization-of

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          • dappled
            11 years ago

            Much truth in violet words. I'd kind of forgotten just *how* stupid people can be (including me, to an extent, in this instance).

            "My brother had that, but he decided to get better"

            They're all *awful*, but that's the one that really makes me want to grind all the teeth out of my head. It's kind of like a double whammy, isn't it? Like, "Hey! You're disabled. Now I'm going to make you feel rather bad about it and also make it seem like it's your fault".

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  • charli.m
    11 years ago

    I've found that most people who haven't lived with it, have no concept of how it is.

    And yeah, it pisses me off when people belittle it. If it was that easy to just "cheer up" I would have done that 18 fucking years ago instead of putting myself through all that shit.

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  • moomus
    11 years ago

    I had to go to job centre once and was telling the woman there about my depression, as she asked if I had any health problems. She told me its all a state of mind and I should just try being happier, and not be miserable all the time. How I didn't slap her right there and then I'll never know. Completely ignorant......

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    • Maya05
      11 years ago

      Ignorant bitch. I would have walked out after that.

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  • dexy77
    11 years ago

    you should read elizabeth wurtzel's "prozac nation" - she gives the most accurate and rich description of depression i've ever read:

    "Slowly, over the years, the data will accumulate in your heart and mind, a computer program for total negativity will build into your system, making life feel more and more unbearable. But you won't even notice it coming on, thinking that it is somehow normal, something about getting older, about turning eight or turning twelve or turning fifteen, and then one day you realize that your entire life is just awful, not worth living, a horror and a black blot on the white terrain of human existence. One morning you wake up afraid that you are going to live.
    " In my case, I was not frightened in the least bit at the thought I might live because I was certain that I was already dead. The actual dying part, the withering away of my physical body, was a mere formality.My spirit, my emotional being, whatever you want to call all that inner turmoil that has nothing to do with physical existence, were long gone, dead and gone, and only a mass of the most f*#$ing god-awful excruciating pain like a pair of boiling hot tongs clamped tight around my spine and pressing on all my nerves was left in its wake.
    "That's the thing I want to make clear about depression. It's got nothing to do with life. In the course of life, there is sadness and pain and sorrow, all of which, in their right time and season, are normal - unpleasant, but normal. Depression is in an altogether different zone because it involves a complete absence: absence of affect, absence of feeling, absence of response, absence of interest. The pain you feel in the course of a major clinical depression is an attempt on nature's part (nature, after all, abhor's a vacuum) to fill up empty space. But for all intents and purposes, the deeply depressed are just the walking, waking dead.
    "And the scariest part is that if you ask anyone in the throes of depression how he got there, to pin down the turning point, he'll never know..."

    show that to the next person who tells you to "get over it"

    source: Elizabeth Wurtzel. "Prozac Nation: Young and Depressed in America" Riverhead Trade 2002: 21-22

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  • ChemGirl
    11 years ago

    Some people haven't been educated about it. When I was a little kid, I never understood why my mom wouldn't get out of bed and make dinner or drive me places like the other mothers. I was mad at her for a long time. I know that's a different situation, but I try to remember that before I get too pissed at other people's ignorant comments.

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  • Shrubskill_Nurse
    11 years ago

    THANK YOU.

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  • GuySavage
    11 years ago

    "Eventually in time we WILL get through it."

    Note everyone, I'm afraid. Depression has been a recurring theme in my life for about 10 years, and it's not going away.

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  • gagamichaeljudy
    11 years ago

    right especially if the comments are coming from friends or family members, thats not cool. I heard that at some point in life we all will go through some type of depression at least once- of course there are different levels, but some people havent lived life yet and think that that nothing will get them down in the dumps

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  • alv1592
    11 years ago

    I have depression and I agree completely. I do think SOME people pretend to be depressed or brag about having problems for attention, but you should never assume.

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  • Maya05
    11 years ago

    Some of my biggest annoyances come from people's ignorance towards depression. The worst is the classic "Just try and be happier" statement. Anyone who says that I want to punch in the head. It would be the same as asking someone who has cancer to just stop having cancer. Just stop being sick. Yeah, okay, I'll get Right on that.../sarcasm.
    It's very frustrating.

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  • rosa333
    11 years ago

    I thought about this a while a go. It is really hard for those with depression to work out a way to cope. Nobody can understand that as it is one of the toughest things that one can deal with. Every day can be a challenge, that is why I believe that people with depression are very strong.

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  • KeddersPrincess
    11 years ago

    Someone named MrRepzion on you tube just made a video about this.

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    Life is strange people don't believe things till they experience it.

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