Is it normal to not really know what feminism is?

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6 Comments

I have always believed that men and women should be equal. I also used to believe that feminism was counter-intuitive towards achieving this goal as a society because I didn't think it was about equality. Then I met my wife, who I've been with for 10 years, and she considers herself a feminist. She taught me that real feminism was about equality and wasn't anti-man at all. I truly believed this, as I did some reading on the subject which supported this claim. However, I'm not sure anymore. I've been attempting to participate in some feminist groups online lately, and I just keep getting ran out of them simply because I am a man. The supposed "misconception" about feminists being anti-man is being slowly confirmed for me, and I'm personally kind of upset about it. I thought I was a feminist because I want women to have equal rights and opportunities and be treated with dignity and respect, but now I'm wondering if what it means to be a feminist today truly is hating men. Now I'm completely confused as to what it all means. Is this kind of moral uproar that I'm having normal?

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94% Normal
Based on 17 votes (16 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • SuperBenzid
    11 years ago

    If you want to know if you are a feminist ask yourself this: do you believe in a Patriarchy? Do you truly believe that there is a secret conspiracy of men designed to keep women down and that by virtue of being a man you are somehow receiving a benefit and participating in this conspiracy? I think which way you come to answer this question will tell you whether you are a feminist or not.

    As an aside:
    Recently a feminist film festival in London asked all men to leave midway through. Is that the actions of people that desire equality?

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    • Lynxikat
      11 years ago

      My answer to this question is mixed; no, I do not think that there is a secret conspiracy to keep women down, and just by being a man you are somehow a part of that said conspiracy. That being said, I do think that women are judged far more harshly in society in general than man are, and it's difficult for women as a whole to be as successful as men are if they are constantly being judged by the media, society, and even by other women.

      TD;LR, I don't think there's an evil male conspiracy against women, but I do think there's a mentality in society that causes women to be judged more harshly for certain actions than men are.

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  • Justsomejerk
    11 years ago

    Sexist bitches.

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  • ZitsOnMyButt
    11 years ago

    I keep hearing about this patriarchy business, and it sounds like tin-foil hat nonsense. In certain parts of the world, there truly is patriarchy (many parts of Asia from the Middle East to India to China), but as global conspiracy, no. There are patriarchal families and communities (like conservative churches) in the West, but it's not really systematic in the 21st century (same goes for institutionalized racism in my opinion). Of course men treat women poorly here in America and all around the world, but that comes from upbringing. We're teaching our son to respect women, and I couldn't even initiate him into some global secret misogynist society, there simply isn't one. I guess now I wonder how I should approach my wife about her "feminism". It seems by today's standards she's "submissive" and not a feminist. This world is getting weirder and weirder...

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  • TheSecret
    11 years ago

    That's weird. Yeah I'm a woman and feminism annoys me, because like you said, today it seems like they just hate men. I think back in like the 20's though it was different, more about equality and not just hating men. But I think they have this weird belief that all men are out to hold women back? I don't know. You should tell them they're being sexist next time they kick you out of a group.

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  • MargieRooster
    11 years ago

    It's just a joke you have yet to hear!

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