Is it normal to think that satan is the good guy in the bible?

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Yeah, we're supposed to think that God is good and the devil is bad, but let's look at what they actually did. God killed countless people directly and ordered his followers to kill many more. If you question him, you die and suffer forever. If you don't follow his instructions to the letter, you die and suffer forever. Hell, even if you don't do anything wrong, he'll still kill you. With the Flood, he killed most the animals too. I mean come on, they literally could not have done anything wrong. Don't forget all the animals he had sacrificed to him. Also, he fucking tortures his followers. Look at the Binding of Isaac. God is worse than John Kramer. Not to mention that if God is in control, then he's responsible for all the horrible things that have ever happened to anyone.

Compare Satan. The original sin, the thing that's supposed to establish Satan as being completely evil, is telling Adam and Eve to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Encouraging people to expand their knowledge seems pretty reasonable to me. What does he do wrong after that? He doesn't kill anyone or order anyone to kill. All he does is encourage people to try new things. He doesn't even punish them for not doing what he says, unlike God. The only time he ever actually does anything to someone is in Job, and that's only because God told Satan to do it, so again, that's an evil act by God, not Satan. This is the bad guy? Someone who has literally never hurt anyone on his own accord?

When Armageddon happens, I'm definitely joining Satan's army. At least I know he won't kill me just for looking at him the wrong way. And since the only thing he ever did was tell people they have a right to question authority, it will be the least stressful army ever. I don't see how an objective reading of the events in the Bible can lead to any other conclusion than that God is a psychopathic tyrant and Satan is a heroic freedom fighter.

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Based on 107 votes (79 yes)
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Comments ( 30 )
  • The_Devil
    10 years ago

    YES! I am a good guy. Your application to my army has been accepted.

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    • randompersonwithattitude
      10 years ago

      good one!

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  • anti-hero
    10 years ago

    Have you ever thought that maybe, just maybe it is all a bunch of stuff some people made up?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Of course it is. I was just pointing out that the people who wrote it were not consistent and didn't establish their characters well.

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      • anti-hero
        10 years ago

        Things were different thousands of years ago.

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      • Faceless
        10 years ago

        Thats hilarious.

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  • outlaw3365
    10 years ago

    in my opinion....just my opinion...i once worshipped satan...stupid of me but i was a mixed up teen...and yes he gave me money, new cars, great things, i started trafficking drugs and had alot of women...until one day i decided to stop following satan and love god...thats when he punished me and sent me to prison...satan that is...the thing about satan is that he uses you until he doesnt need you anymore...when he's done with you hell throw you away like a piece of shitty toilet paper..thats what he did to me..god isnt the enemy, god loves you the thing is that with god he doesnt force himself on you you have to search him..like i said just my point of view....but what the fuck do i know..

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  • Nephew7
    10 years ago

    I would suggest you read the satanic bible, one its just a story...but..even in that story satan was the one who gave knowledge and god wanted adam and eve to be forever stupid, but in all reality if god did create everything he could have simply never created evil,much less a book tainted of contradictions, my two cents is god and satan are one, the symbolic spectrum of creation vs destruction, love and hate, the weak and the strong....hail satan!!

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  • BLAh81
    10 years ago

    You are 100% correct. According to the Bible, the Christian God has killed 2,476,633 people (
    http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.nl/2006/08/how-many-has-god-killed.html), while Satan has "only" killed 10 people. These can all be found in the Book of Job. The funny thing is that God even plays a significant role in THOSE killings too!

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  • q1w2e3
    10 years ago

    "Your" measure of good and bad is different than that of what Allah has described as evil and good. Let me put it in analogy. Let's say you have a friend that is very good person. He is helpful, polite, smart, does social responsibility, donates money to the poor and needy..etc. so basically you consider him as "good guy". One day however you saw him beating his mother badly.. Would you still consider him good guy? Of course not. This one evil act of his, has effectively wiped out all his food deeds and now you consider him as bad guy.

    Similarly, in the eyes of Allah. The most evil deed is that of disobedience to him. Therefore Shaytaan is considered the worst being in Islam.

    Hope that puts it in correct perspective.

    Peace

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    • SuperBenzid
      10 years ago

      I would still think he was a good guy who simply had a deep flaw in that regard.

      Whereas Allah chose a pedophile to be his messenger and seemingly encourage that messenger to commit genocide like in Banu Qurayza. That to me is more than a deep flaw, it is evil.

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  • PaulXavier
    10 years ago

    You see God punishing people for not doing what he wants. God sees people doing things that will destroy themselves and tells them to stop. Satan Knows that you will die if you lie down on highway in the middle of traffic. He knows you will grow numb and apathetic if you pursue sex instead of love. He tells it's no problem and watches as death consumes you. Jesus died for you. Satan wants your death.

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    • AppleMind
      10 years ago

      But you only "know" these things because you read a book which speaks favorably of God and ill of Satan. How can you claim to know Satan's intentions if he has never given his side?

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  • ProseAthlete
    10 years ago

    Your teen conformity-masquerading-as-iconoclasm is just as cute as a bug's ear, you little Satan-lovin' emo kid, you! ^_^

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    • SuperBenzid
      10 years ago

      What a pathetic attempt at dismissing what he is saying. It is conformity now to not be Christian? Which country are you living in?

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      • ProseAthlete
        10 years ago

        I'm saying that what he's saying is trite, high-school-freshman-level thinking. That's fine if he's actually a high school freshman, although that would probably make him too young for this site, but it really is just silliness. It isn't because it's non-Christian that it's silly; it's that it's really unsophisticated thinking.

        As Counterfeit.Circus pointed out, old mythologies that have been passed down through a a few millennia aren't necessarily going to have tight plot lines.

        You're right, though; I probably shouldn't have said anything if I couldn't say something nice. I didn't think it was that cutting, but I guess it was a little rude to point out that it was the philosophical equivalent of a puppy discovering his reflection in the mirror.

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        • SuperBenzid
          10 years ago

          "it's really unsophisticated thinking. "
          I'd like to know why you believe that?
          I will agree the language is at a freshman level, using "literally" for emphasis, etc. However that doesn't necessarily lead to the thought behind it being silly.

          While I think Satan being a heroic figure is the obvious conclusion from reading the Bible. It is not the normal one. Paradise Lost is the only major work in the English canon I know of that hints at Satan being a heroic figure.

          I might be able to see your point of view if it was a normal conclusion but because it is a fairly rare one, I really can't see what your problem is with it. I would like to know why you feel it is trite and silly? This person has at least provided an adequate chain of reasoning to their claim which is something you have neglected to do, twice.

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          • ProseAthlete
            10 years ago

            It's a matter of who we hung out with in junior high and high school, I guess, because I remember the stoners in back of the school and the disenfranchised goth kids (including me) discussing something really similar to this: "Dude, what if...like...what if Satan is the GOOD guy, y'know? Like, 'cause he never did anything wrong except try to get people to learn stuff, unlike God who, like, got really mad and punished everyone all the time."

            I heard it a lot. A whole lot. When I was 13 or 14, it seemed kind of surprising and revolutionary, but it felt a little callow to me by the time I was 16 or so. Maybe I heard the idea so often because so many of my friends went to Catholic schools here in New Orleans, and years of religion classes made people rebel in the most predictable, oppositional way possible.

            It wasn't a thoughtful reinterpretation of the bible for them so much as it was a way to shock, the high school version of a toddler who learns the word "No!" and uses it at every opportunity. "No" is an important step toward defining who you are, but it's a step that most people take at some point.

            Googling "Lucifer as hero" produces about 37 million results, some of which are indeed references to Paradise Lost. You're right that it isn't explored as a literary theme much, but I'm not sure if that's because it's a taboo subject or because it's an epiphany that happens to a great many people and is therefore not a stunning revelation.

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            • SuperBenzid
              10 years ago

              So ideas you personally have encountered before are trite and overused.
              Um, I'm not trying to be mean here but you come across as incredibly self centered. Almost comically so. Just because you have experienced an idea repeatedly in life does not make it trite. You do realize there is more to reality than your personal experience of it?
              Still moving on.

              "Googling "Lucifer as hero""
              I googled it with the quotation marks as you put it. It yielded 43 results. Googling "bird's nest soup" yields 126,000 result. So a uncommon Chinese delicacy rarely written in English that few in the west have heard of is far more common...
              Without quotation marks it 4,330,000 vs 1,460,000
              You're not exactly bringing great evidence here.

              I will accept that you have met some people in your life that cast Lucifer as hero without what you consider to be a great basis for the claim. I do not understand why you feel this personal experience and Google is somehow evidence to dismiss the claim outright and insult this person as you did.

              At no time in the previous comment did you even cover anything this person actually said. But instead talked about people you had met, Google and a rather odd non sequiter about toddlers. My conclusion is that you are a someone who thinks the world revolves around themselves and is now starting to clutch at straws to explain their poor behavior.

              On a personal note this exceptionally self absorbed nature goes a long way to explaining your support of feminism and why you thought men couldn't understand the danger women felt in public even though men are twice as likely to be assaulted by a stranger.

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        • TheDawg
          10 years ago

          You have committed a classic genetic fallacy.

          What you have done is discredited an argument based on assumption about the arguer.

          Next time engage the argument directly,

          NOT a weakened version of it.

          It is your logic that is flawed and 'freshman-level'

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  • EvilUncleEarnie
    8 years ago

    Some choice, worship a Sociopath with delusions of grandeur, or worship satan. I prefer to worship neither. Perhaps if I ever find a god worthy or worship, I will start to worship him/her/it.

    I was raised a christian and was one for a long time until I looked around me and realized that the so called god I was worshipping was not worthy of worship. I committed the major unpardonable sin that christians can commit which is asking questions. I learned quickly that christians are not christ like.

    I looked around and saw the evil men prosper and the so called good men suffer. If god was fair and acted like a real god, then we would be punished or rewarded by what we do here. Evil men would not prosper, good men would. Each good act or each evil act would be rewarded or punished immediately.

    I question how we are judged only on this time on earth. How can taking a micro-second and judging us, sentence us to "heaven" or "hell" for the rest of eternity be fair? That would be like me taking a random second and depending on what my kids were doing locking them away in a closet or giving them presents every hour for the rest of their lives.

    Another thing that gripes my rump is the saying, "Store up treasures in the kingdom of heaven". Why in the hell would we need treasure in heaven? Is god going to charge us rent? We do not need treasure in heaven, we need it here on earth.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    Haha stupid ass motherfuckers. It's the devil playing with yo minds already. Satan can never be your friend! Stupid fuckers. You know, when you do something bad you hear those 2 voices? One telling you not to do that cuz it will hurt your mommas feelings, and then comes satan telling you, you should and your momma won't figure it out.
    He don't give a fuck about you. But if yall like him some much yall can go to his home a chill a lil bit, make sure you put on some sunlotion. :)

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  • DiamondGirl
    10 years ago

    I was raped by the Devil a few years ago!

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  • Jfdp
    10 years ago

    I know this might seem bizarre, but do you guys remember, the last season of Lost? I personally believe God and Satan must be awfully like Jacob and his brother,The one is good but drives a hard bargain, the other is very winning but screws you over in the end.These too fighting each other eternally with a bunch of innocent, and not-so-innocent people stuck in the middle of it

    But IL be wary of Satan and his little Army though, he must be a sneaky little bastard, i'm sure if the devil could walk among us he wouldn't be a evil psychopath, he'd be the most charming, likable person you ever met, who could manipulate you for his own gain like no one else.

    Also, about the whole "tree of knowledge" thing
    That same intelligence that gave us all the wonders of technology also gave us guns and tanks and nuclear weopons
    it works both ways.

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  • Piet
    10 years ago

    Like outlaw3365 is saying. go speak to people that worshipped satan and you will find a picture that you do not whant.
    Satan was the head of angles and he wanted to over throne God and thereby take a 1/3 of the angles with him against God, that why he and the demons (fallen angles)are out of hevan. God created man/woman in His own image and give them a free will and satan is jellos of you and will destroy you. So you have the choice to follow God or satan. If you do not follow God the creator, no matter what religion you follow you are following satan. And satan wil do what ever he can to stop you to go to heaven( a promise for the followers of God) and blame it on God. Hell was created for satan and his demons not for us, but if you choose not to follow God as those The Bible speak of, don't blame God.
    Have you ever seen when one has been delivered from demons. go ask that person what his live was before and after.
    Satan is a sissy who hides his tru beeing and blames God for all his is doing, and we are fools to believe him.
    If you want to see the truth ask God to open your spiritual eyes.
    God is not a bully or dictator, satan are.

    SO THAT IS IN SHORT, A LOT MORE CAN BE SAY ACAINST YOUR WRITING

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    You have been lead astray by Satan. Repent my child.

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  • q25t
    10 years ago

    History (or in this case, mythology) is written by the victors.

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  • MisterDam
    10 years ago

    That's what he wants you to think, which is why he personally wrote the very bible you read

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