Is it normal to want to slap bald babies on the head?

74 Comments

I was in the supermarket the other day and up ahead of me i saw a mother ignoring a particularly strange looking and sounding baby crying its tits off. I met the infuriating couple once again a few aisles down and the mother and baby had both refused to desist in their futile power game and i had the most peculiar temptation to slap the bald baby (Geoffrey) on the head whilst the mother had her back turned as i was sure to get away with it as Geoffrey was already sweating from the eyes - am i normal??

YES!	437
NO!	261
don't have kids	242
Other (Add a comment)	20

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Comments ( 74 )

Chromatic

13 years ago | pl

I'd slap the mother on the head instead.

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Doobee

13 years ago | pl

slapping babies is awesome

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J3000GT

13 years ago | pl

Having the urge is normal. Acting upon those urges is not. Just stay away from annoying babies and/or animals unless you are a horrible clinical sociopath like me who DOES act on those urges and tends to end up jailed when I'm unlucky enough to get caught. I wish I was kidding. Call me sick, doesn't change things... anyway I think the urge to wanna hit ugly AND bad children is very normal and wouldn't worry about it. (But you might not wanna take my advice either)

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MBakke

13 years ago | pl

I'd slap that

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- slapittillitcries
  
  9 years ago
  
  I'd slap it to. Very hard and very often!!
  
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Lord_Of_All_Cabbage

13 years ago | pl

Even haired babys need a good smack on the head!

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- slapittillitcries
  
  9 years ago
  
  Yeah slap them in the head. Then pull their hair. LOL
  
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[Old Memory]

13 years ago | pl

you sound like yve been slapped on the head one time too many, moron

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sheilarae1987

13 years ago | pl

I've heard noises (really annoying noises, sometimes from babies, majority of the time from like other annoying things though) that give me the urge to punch a baby....but I'd never do it, because that's mean, but a light tap, like the way you pat your child when you praise them, or when you praise a pet, would be acceptable, maybe with a lil more oomph, but only if the time is right, LoLz.

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- slapittillitcries
  
  9 years ago
  
  The time is always right to hit babies and small children. I prefer hitting fat girls because they are so soft and already have Joe self-esteem because they are fatties. They are very easy to slap their faces hard then punch them maybe 3 or 4 Times in their fat gut.
  
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  - sheilarae1987
    
    9 years ago
    
    Um, advertising that you like to abuse women, skinny or fat makes you an asshole. Just F.Y.I
    
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- ScouserMum
  
  13 years ago
  
  Im sure given time we will be reading about you and people like you ... shaken baby syndrome springs too mind ! fukwit!
  
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  - sheilarae1987
    
    9 years ago
    
    I actually wasn't as mean as the author, I always feel the need to slap bald men too, and usually it's the ones who choose to shave their heads, because they look ridiculous.
    
    You're not too smart, eh?
    
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moose89

13 years ago | pl

Go ahead, you probably should. You'll get arrested, so I hope you like prison. And penis.

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Tay0915

12 years ago

I hate kids and i am not the only one out there so basically , it is normal to want to slap a kid... dont lie people we've all wanted to at some time lol

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- slapittillitcries
  
  9 years ago
  
  I want to slap pinch and punch them all over. Mark them up a bit. Leave bruises on their fat soft bodies. I'd love to have one under my control now. I'd rule her with an iron fist. FIST being the key word. It would cry for days. L O L
  
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  - sheilarae1987
    
    9 years ago
    
    rule "HER" with an iron fist?
    So if you had a son, he'd get away with murder but if you had a girl, you might just have to beat her?
    
    You have really strong issues with women, get over it, prick face.
    
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oldfashioned-

13 years ago

Ahem..LMFAOLMOFA HAHAA
Is it normal to want to slap bald babies on the head?

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LifeCanBeHard

13 years ago

that made me lol so hard, but no you could give them brain damage cause there heads still soft

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- GuineaPigsRock
  
  12 years ago
  
  when I read "their heads are still soft" I loled and imagined someone grabbing a babies head and squeezing it softly and it felt nice.
  
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  - slapittillitcries
    
    9 years ago
    
    Everything sounds nice when talking about panhandling a baby. I watched a nanny on u tube. She was beating this baby and throwing it around like a rag. I though what a lucky SOB. I wanted to be that nanny. I wouldn't have been stupid enough to manhandle the brat at home with nanny cams. I'd take it to an abandoned house or a quiet street and beat it for easily half hour. I would also let other people slap her for a price.
    
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  - LifeCanBeHard
    
    12 years ago
    
    lawl. im just perverted and now you mentioned that bit im thinking of something else..........XD
    
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deedeliriant

13 years ago

Is it normal to eat babies?

Dee
xox

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- TengMarley
  
  12 years ago
  
  in china its
  normal
  
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kickababy

12 years ago

yes - especially if you're going to get away with it

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[Old Memory]

12 years ago

dead baby jokes are osm!

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frankiestrange

12 years ago

What on earth? That made me laugh so much! :L

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SweetandTenderHooligan

13 years ago

I'd slap the mom.

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don't_hate_just_rate_<3

13 years ago

its normal but just dont do it cu u might get slaped so dat u become bald

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hugmonster

12 years ago

IIN to shake a baby? i hope so, and i hope its legal

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windowlicker

12 years ago

I hate babies but I absolutely hate people who bring their kids to the supermarket

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crackdispenor

12 years ago

slap the shit out of that little crying fuck and slap the mother for not shuting her baby up in a public place

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theartist89

12 years ago

Babies are freaking annoying when they scream. The urge to slap them is normal. Doing so is not.

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thebone12

12 years ago

yes slap the bitch

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[Old Memory]

12 years ago

i think bald babies r sexy :D i would fudge one

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death_sabbath

12 years ago

i wanna kick the mother instead

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Eikof

12 years ago

The urge to slap babies is normal.

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Al725

12 years ago

Trollicious!Only funny if your not serious though.

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RoxasXAxel

13 years ago

You see for me, I not only wanna smack the baby but I wanna beat the literal shit out of the mother for not training that baby any better. If she don't like the sound of her own crying baby, I highly doubt anybody else will.

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- slapittillitcries
  
  9 years ago
  
  Just put duct tape on the brats mouth or just put a hand over its mouth and push hard. Slap her hard first then put your hand on the bitches mouth. F there about 2 or 3 years old tell her that you will beat the shit out of her and watch her tremble with fear. I think that would be fun
  
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Smurf20

13 years ago

I'll bet many of us would have the urge but would not seriously consider acting on it. Also, I wonder if it has to do with some sort of subconscious biological imperative that compells one to eliminate offspring that is not one's own, thus reduce competition.

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[Old Memory]

13 years ago

Haha. I get the felling too (Very often)
Dont do it but.. Okay, if you can do it without nobody is lokking and you get away with it (And the "baby" is really annoying)Then go for it.. But not too hard Lol..

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- ScouserMum
  
  13 years ago
  
  Dick ^ ^
  
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howaminotmyself

13 years ago

You sound very immature. I bet you are one of those people who laughs at their own jokes when no one else is laughing back.

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- [Old Memory]
  
  12 years ago
  
  Shut up.
  
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  - howaminotmyself
    
    12 years ago
    
    Well that was rude.
    
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[Old Memory]

13 years ago

What is wrong with you? I WILL PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE.

I'm exagerrating but I'm not sure I'd be able to keep my hands off you if you had said that to me in person.

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wreckd

13 years ago

Wowww. You have to ignore babies when they do that. If you give him/her attention (no matter what kind) when they are bad, they will know to do something bad will get your attention. You punish when they're toddlers and if you raise them right as babies, they won't act that way when they're of age. You never slap babies. That is just disgusting behavior of yourself!

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JadedUnknown

10 years ago

ew babies

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hairyfairy

11 years ago

I hate shopping sometimes because of screaming kids in supermarkets. Why can`t parents leave their noisy brats with a minderwhen they go shopping.

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th33INSAN33

11 years ago

I always have the most intense urge to use baby intestines as a decoration piece. That's how much I have towards them.

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Hussainthemvp

11 years ago

Id do it to hear that SMACK!!

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ben10

12 years ago

babies are cute, why would you hit them, for my baby cousin all I want to do it protect her and make sure nothing ever happens to her because she is adorable and innocent.

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sti11

12 years ago

it is normal to wan to but to actually do it is not.

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[Old Memory]

12 years ago

Maybe one day you should to get it out of your system, providing it's not stupidly hard of course but babies aren't as fragile as you think, after a certain point anyway, obviously to begin with they are

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nipsackpattywack

12 years ago

the sound of a good baby slap does a heart good. specially when its a sharp pap sound coming from a bald babys head

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tofi

12 years ago

I blame the staff/management at the supermarket. they should have heard an incident taking place i.e. bad parenting and breach of the peace, ejected the screaming individual via the back door with a little tap to the head and given you the peace and quiet to continue your purchases'. that is the civilised standard we should adhere too

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XxKatiexX

12 years ago

Hahahah DO IT!!

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amunet

12 years ago

i dont know if its normal but its funny, well the urge is but i wouldnt do it you could get in a lot of trouble plus its wrong to hit babies bald or haired

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kittenlittle

12 years ago

slap the mother, the baby was probably hungry, tired or uncomfortable, she should have gave it a biddy or tittie to suck on

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ScouserMum

13 years ago

fooked up ^ ^

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sheilarae1987

13 years ago

also - is it normal to love the soft feeling of a babies peach fuzz, when their not completely bald but lacking a full head of hair, its such an awesome feeling, soo00oo soft. awesome beans! Yay!

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- lilsouthernbell
  
  12 years ago
  
  Omg! I do too. I loooooove when my new babies are born and tiny and they have a scent unique between each mommy and baby. But the peach fuzzy super soft head wresting on my cheek gets me through the long nights :)
  
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LIVERPOOL

12 years ago

Holy fuck. Hurting children is just so wrong.

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kattbaby

12 years ago

I think almost evryone here is a little ummm.. immature..

Slapping babies is really kinda stupid and any onw who has the urge to slap babies we'll thenn........

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fightagainstheyouth

12 years ago

thats horrible! poor child!!!!! Practice kindnesss

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[Old Memory]

12 years ago

NO you NEVER HIT a BABY what the fucks wrong with you man

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Evelyn27

13 years ago

I can see smacking a balding jerk in the head but a baby is defenceless. I would suggest finding a good retirement community to take your aggressions out on...they do fight back though so maybe try and kick a puppy. But they will bite...hmmm

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- nipsackpattywack
  
  12 years ago
  
  yeah the seniors are a little more gamy. it poses more of a challenge, making things a little more interesting!
  
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veryhumbleperson

13 years ago

I hope its more of a loving pat on the head, but this is a deplorable habit really. It's akin to hitting a disabled person, they have no way of defending themselves and it could put you in court.

I'd recommend keeping this away from the babies' heads.

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blacksheep13

12 years ago

DON'T DO IT!

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CrystalMoonlight

12 years ago

Hmmmm... I think I'd use it's head as a bongo drum... >D

I don't mean in a curel way, guys, I love children, and I wouldn't slap it. :/

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- crackdispenor
  
  12 years ago
  
  u cant hit the top of the head dummy its soft still.. its better to slap than to hit
  
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Tryme

12 years ago

Disgusting, You need phsytriatric help.

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Are You Normal?

Is it normal to want to slap bald babies on the head?