Is it normal to wish the demise of really unpleasant people?

10 Comments

Have you ever read "A Little Princess"? In case you don't know, it's about a little rich girl named Sara living at a school for girls, but when she loses her fortune the wicked headmistress, Miss Minchin, turns her into a servant and treats her quite cruelly. One day after slapping her, the child is just looking at her and Miss Minchin asks her what she's staring at. Sara just says "I was thinking." Minchin says something like "You were thinking? How dare you think! What were you thinking?!"

In an earlier scene, Sara wants the scullery maid Becky to take part in some of the activities of the rich pupils, saying that she's a little girl too. But here's narrow minded Miss Minchin: "My dear Sara," she said, "Becky is the scullery maid. Scullery maids--er--are not little girls."

It really had not occurred to her to think of them in that light. Scullery maids were machines who carried coal scuttles and made fires.'

These scenes always reminds me of my experiences in retail.

Unfortunately I'm STILL in retail, and obviously it entails a LOT of customer service. Yesterday I had a rude, snotty, condescending middle aged customer who treated me like utter sh*t. For enterainment purposes let's call her Miss Minchin =D I made an "Ooookayyy lady" face lol (I'm very expressive, I can't help it!) and very politely pointed out to her that the things she was accusing me of were false. The fact that a lowly cashier like me had the nerve to actually react and defend myself like a person, instead of a robot without feelings, clearly was the utmost impertinence to her. Miss Minchin asked for the manager afterward and complained, flipped the entire thing around and said I was the rude one, and she was NEVER coming back, would turn business away, threat after threat after threat.

To her, the lowest common denominators of society are people like me- people who do jobs she wouldn't deign to do. In her narrow mind, I'm not quite a person who has my own thoughts and feelings, and might be hurt by her nasty tone. I'm a machine who bags groceries and keeps a plastic smile on as she spits in my face and dehumanizes me. And god help me if I don't!

And to ME, people like her are the worst sort of people. If you abuse people who you consider to be in a position of vulnerability...who you know can't talk back to you because they NEED their job, and therefore you have the power to take away their dignity and you take that opportunity...well, you're not just a coward, you're evil. You're a flat out BAD PERSON. And I honestly think the world would be a more pleasant place without people like this. By the end of the day, after having thought about how this AWFUL, lying woman caused me my first complaint ever at this job after 9 months, I started to feel like, you know...wouldn't it be great if she got into a car wreck immediately after leaving? Just the thought of it made me all aglow lol.

You might say, well that's pretty harsh, does she really deserve that? But think of all the people she must have abused throughout her lifetime. How many people's days she's ruined, so casually too.

Clearly I'm not the only person who thinks this way given the prevalence of people who strongly believe in "karma". I'm just curious though, does anyone else feel this strongly about people who mess with your job or your life?

Yes, it's normal, and I agree! 18
Yes, it's normal, but I don't get as worked up about it as you do. 8
Maybe it's a little over the top. 3
No, it's not normal, it's actually kind of mean. 2
No, you should go to anger management or something. 4
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Comments ( 10 )
  • Holzman_67
    9 years ago

    You're mad, upset and are blowing this out of proportion. There are always going to be assholes. You're not the problem. She probably has a sick mother, is going through a divorce, is dealing with a son who's addicted to drugs. You just don't know. My advice in customer service is to be ready for all types of people and never, NEVER take it personally.

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    • [Old Memory]
      9 years ago

      I try not to take it personally, but I won't invent excuses for why people sneer at others for no apparent reason. This woman wasn't satisfied to just be snotty to me, blow off steam and then move on with her day; she went outside, unloaded her groceries, and then waddled back in to make sure she thoroughly screwed me over. Who knows, maybe this complaint was the excuse my boss needed to get rid of me. Does she know what's going on in MY life? No, and she didn't care. SHE didn't need to try and contemplate the reasons behind my imagined rudeness, yet as retail workers were constantly asked and expected to make excuses for the assholes we encounter. Maybe that makes it easier for some people to cope with the abuse, I don't know. It doesn't for me. To me, no matter what you're going through, you're still expected to act like an adult, and treat people with basic human dignity. Your troubles do not entitle you to shit all over people you don't know.

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      • Holzman_67
        9 years ago

        Well I don't know what happened or what was said but I tell you, there will always be assholes, who take their bad day, year or decade out on someone. Of course they're not entitled to do that, but there's nothing to prevent it from happening at any stage so it's best to be prepared have a thick skin and a stiff upper lip. I'm sorry to hear you lost your job.

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        • [Old Memory]
          9 years ago

          On a second scan of your comment I realized you're not making excuses for her, you're simply saying that you can't account for why people act that way, so just don't take it personally. I'm just so used to other people literally telling me to completely forgive and excuse their behavior because "you don't know what they're going through" that I assumed that's what you meant. I actually didn't lose my job, I just used that as a what-if situation to show that she didn't even consider that that could be a possible outcome, and if she did, she didn't care.

          I was just telling my coworker yesterday that my big problem is that I expect people to act in a rational, logical way, and even after all these years I haven't figured out that that's NEVER going to be the case. And as a result I'm always baffled, hurt and angry.

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          • Holzman_67
            9 years ago

            Definitely not making excuses for her. There is no excuse behind that behaviour but it always helps me to understand that there is a backstory there, more to it. You can detach easier. I've worked in customer service/retail most my life so trust me, I know where you're coming from and my sympathies are with you.

            The thing is to not let it defeat you or your service excellence to others.

            I think getting as upset and angry in return to the irrational person just gives them power, fuels them on. As hard as it is, I actually turn the "polite meter" up in these situations and give them nothing. The way they are behaving is then put in stark contrast with yourself and you maintain dignity and professionalism. Alot of the time this actually calms them down cos from whatever bad place they're in they can snap back to reality in some cases.

            It's never an easy thing but you do get hardened/wiser/better at it over time. Good luck in the future.

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        • Holzman_67
          9 years ago

          And always remember; you're not the problem.

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  • flightlesskiwi
    9 years ago

    Your reaction seems normal to me. Because of your story I'm definitely going to be extra nice to people who work in retail. It really can't be easy to have to deal with nasty people as much as you have to and to keep smiling at the same time.

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    • [Old Memory]
      9 years ago

      Hey thanks, that's as much as any of us can ask for.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    I used to to work in customer service/technical support, I feel your pain, sugar.
    ;-)
    Hang in there.

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  • Arm0se
    9 years ago

    Too much to read.

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