Is my mother suicidal?

Once your kids become your identity, it’s kinda hard to find yourself again. She’s probably not gonna off herself. I saw shit like that all the time. But I’d never say it to my kids.

Either she is suicidal, or she is manipulative. Some people use threats of suicide to control the people around them. I don't know your mother well enough to suggest which category she falls into. You can't force your mother to get therapy. She's an adult older than you. She knows the options available to her. If she doesn't seek treatment, then no treatment can be given to her. It's not your responsibility to mother your mother. You are her child. Not her parent. If you are very worried, call the local suicide prevention hotline and tell them about your mom.

I've heard in a suicide prevention class one time that you should always treat it seriously whenever someone says they want to die, even if they do say it in a joking kind of way, since there may be some seriousness to it. They may be too afraid to tell you outright, so that's like their subconscious desperately trying to hint at it instead.

If you do plan on asking her about it, then the only other thing I remember from that class right now is that you should ask directly, rather than indirectly. Like you should ask "Do you ever think about suicide?" rather than "You don't ever think about suicide, do you?". Because they're much more likely to deny it with the second question.