Is this the stupidest statement you've heard?

*The following is something that I'm copying and pasting from a forwarded email that I once received.*

These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said ...in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
_______________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
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ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
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ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
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ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.
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ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
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ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
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ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He's 20, much like your IQ.
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ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shiting me?
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ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid
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ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
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ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
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ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
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ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
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ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral...
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ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
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And last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

It's pretty dumb. Like swabbing someone's arm with alcohol before giving them a lethal injection.

I used to work with some fairly idiotic people.

After the Sept 11 destruction of the Twin Towers in America I went into work the next day fairly numb from the whole event.

I said to a woman there: 'The world feels like a different place today, doesn't it?'

Her response.....

'Yes. It was funny that happening. Our landlord is a Pakistani and he won't unblock our drains'.

That is pretty much the stupidest statement I ever heard.

No the stupidest statement I ever heard came from Mariah Carey.
She said and I quote;

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

Up there for sure, but I've heard so many incredibly stupid statements over the years awful hard to pick one.

No idea, although I recently read an article about a member of Ukip saying that the bad weather in England is our punishment, from God, for making gay marriage legal. What a bunch of tossers.

the usual meds used to put those to death are no longer available or wont b shipped to us bc the country that has it is against the dealth penalty.it usually takes about 15 minutes from injection to death with this new med it took 26 or 27 mins. He looked dead but kept gasping for air while his chest would rise and fall. My thought is that he showed no mercy to that pregnant woman why not just shoot him n be done.

I'm too stupid to think of the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Not the stupidest that I've heard.
Fuck that guy who raped and killed a lady though,. Fuck that guy over and over until he rips in half.. Then talk about serious harm.

Up the bum no babies!

The guy raped and killed a young, pregnant woman; there isn't nearly enough serious in what little harm came to that pathetic piece of shit murderer!

Check for anything Sarah Palin said. You will get a good laugh.
Maverick maverick maverick!

Nope, but it's kinda ironic, because this may be the stupidest poll I've seen.

I powersharted

I've heard people say things that were much, much dumber than that.

I like... Mexican bread...

Is that stupid enough?

Meh, not that dumb. She meant "harm" as in psychological and physical suffering. The procedure is supposed to be designed to be quick and painless. Perhaps using the word "harm" wasn't the best choice, but I get what she was saying.

Anything Jaden Smith says.

No, it's not the stupidest statement I have ever heard.