Let me guess what animal you are

lets go chase some squirrels

Dog (lucky guess)
Buddy mentality. Curiously friendly and politely self-introduced. Bright and eager approach, awkward pull back. Are you told “nobody asked” often? Well loved, but not the best fit for cat people. Excellent bounce-back ability

Panda.

One of those monkeys in bali that steals tourist's liquor and just gets wasted and cacks around for a bit and them mysteriously disappears for a while...

Kookaburra.
Residential hypeman. Everybody can tell you’re enjoying yourself and that can either make them wide-eyed admire you, or yell at the noise. Good moral birdittude, but preached alongside the sound of go-go music. Liable to peck eyes out if threatened, offers treats and snacks to well-behaved rugrats.

Beaver.
Enjoys thinking. Listens to, and understands, both sides - but doesn’t always pick which one to be on, get radical already! Has the tools to save the world, but might not jump to action right away. Builds a collection of knowledge, has pride in knowing. Chill vibe, if people knew what you had you’d be hounded

To me a deer, able to be a fighter when necessary but pretty chill mostly, munching some leaves & observing enough to see the world for what it is.

Oh I don’t know, trying to think of an animal that STEALS MY SPOTLIGHT ! Kidding hehe

Otter.
Slinky by design but bold by nature. Crafty, clever, but never malicious. Feel like you would fix a strangers hair for them, or pick a piece of debris off their shirt. Very easily slips between relaxing and getting things done, figured out how to do both at the same time. Might bite ankles

Raccoon.
Classy garbage couture. If you aren’t the hillbilly-style of chubby, I recommend becoming it. Single “ha” vibes. Does it tire you out always being right? Probably knows too many sub-genres of music. Big irony fan. More capable than some of the other forest goblins, but they all benefit from it

To me, ferret. Mostly because I think of you as a cute noodle weasel in a way, but a smart little creature who got foisted into various alternative lifestyle places until they found their noodle weasel power and started biting faces like a mofo

Maybe a troodon. They were a relatively small dinosaur but you didn't want to piss them off by any means as they would find a way to fuck you up! And they were super resourceful. They were clever AF and could eat meat or plants. They were also mistaken for more recent huge lizards for a long time, so misunderstood like that MF Jodie Foster if you don't listen carefully. It's 2021 and even CountessDouche is still figuring out that CountessDouche MF. A lot to unwrap.

House cat isn't bad either but that's just like saying a superior human. Technically capable of being lovey dovey with other critters with _earned_ respect but really needs its space and time to just sit around being cool. They also domesticated themselves. Simply saw a partnership which is super baller.

Yeah a house cat sounds cute let me just…

HONEY BADGER.
Justified and calculated violence, but shit you didn’t have to bite them /that/ hard. If they surrender, you eat them. If they retreat, you chase them. If they fight, you win. We can’t convert the dead, CD! Loyal to the very last breath, your word is your lord. “I’m not stubborn, I’m just done deciding on an opinion”. Absolute dream ally, nightmare foe

You're similar to a "moth", I suppose. You are not that crystalline, though you are most certainly "opaque". Very much translucent under certain lighting, as are more parasitic creatures. You remind me more of a Monarch butterfly though honestly. They can literally fly at 30mph and they are much more creepy and calculating than most moths I have met. Nonetheless, I can tolerate and learn from them I suppose.

I literally fucking buried one in my backyard and I have another 2 in my freezer lmao. What can I say? It's Spring! Monarchs abound almost "everywhere".

A spider, a vicious abusive spider. Will your horrific manipulation never end? I doubt it. Dear God. Everyone needs to hear more about this from people who have blocked you so it can be completely objective.

Moose.
One of the lower energy animals on the list of creatures that could beat the shit out of me. How do I describe “a chiller anarchist with more structure and less bombs, but still some bombs” to a cop? You want the best for everyone, just not entirely convinced you should stick around for the party. A moose could use the help of a fox if they really wanted to make a ruckus in the world. Less arm crossing, more knife tossing!

Chicken with rabies that wants to cross the road violently

Rabbit with a bowtie. Too nice for it's own good, but distinguished

I am not OP but IMO...

You would be a meerkat. Curious, sweet but capable of aggression when threatened.

Too new ! Come back when you’ve made an ass of yourself like the rest of us !

Bison.
Defense maximus. All harm is given in blunt force, mentally and physically, you offer bruises not blood. Calmer than the bull, you are able to be solitary while still in a group. Freer than the ox, you have the potential to offer everything, but you do not believe you are obligated to. People enjoy you from whichever distance away that you choose

Panther.
Non-confrontational. Big “that’s just my opinion” energy. Slight air of arrogance but not in a loud way. Sketchy enough to sometimes squint at but not enough to bother fussing over. Intellectually sharp if asked about the right thing at the right time. Chronic ‘shrug’er

The yeast. The animal that is actually a fungus thus making you look as smart as a mushroom.

Jack Rabbit.
I get kinda the “kooky prospector from a Western movie” type vibe. A liiiittle off your rocker. You sure as shit know some things down pat, but they’re topics some wouldn’t know enough about to know whether you’re right or wrong. That there pride is fixin’ to kill ya, son. If you don’t already tuck your shirt into your belt buckle, y’oughta start

Fuckin Raven

Meeeeee

Bear.
Generally jolly and content in life. “Enjoy the moment” type person. Positive outlook. Believes that work is work, would rather be pursuing passions or lazing, but gets the hours done responsibly. Floating on the water or chasing a quick thrill, you make yourself comfortable. Able to like/think obnoxious things, but gets a pass because it’s always done in a non-offending way.

You would be a bull. A solid, horny beast of burden but not such a sensitive soul! You don't sugar coat things. You like what you like. And whatever you don't like, you charge at it with full force.

A cockatoo. Chilled, funny and a wee bit moody. It's probably in the name, too.

Caribou.
Able to be goofy without obnoxious over the top energy coming with it. Non-threatening but not expected or targeted to be a pushover. “Clumsy-capable”. Casual enjoyable company that doesn’t demand attention

Big chongus

Hen.
Feel like you enjoy a good Knick-knack every now and then to put on any ledge available. Could probably put any critter in your nest and it would be raised up right. Do you have a hard time passing up a yard sale? A good peck can keep the punks in their place. Feathers can be quick to ruffle!

Hello duh

Grimpoteuthis. Never fucking see your ass enough, but a good mixture of kinda funny and cool.

Lioness.
You have a proudness to you, but it’s controlled and admired. Able to contain the cubs, you handle the world with sharp claws but soft paws. Liiiittle bit of a girlboss winemom vibe. Matured so far past maturity that you became immature all over again. Big swick energy

Early 90's sindbad, but with a secret gimp suit in his closet

Not the mad hatter, not tweedle dee nor tweedle dum, not the rabbit,……….. must be the queen of hearts!

You're the Joey in the kangaroo pouch who randomly got drawn in a furry porn of mum kangaroo getting railed or whatever, and who's looking around like...

WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THIS SHIT!?

That fuckin cow that flew by in Twister, that got sucked up by the tornado

Hawk.
Quick in the head, but assumes others are too to the point you forget to clarify. Not always a huge fan of playing along. A t-rex that suffered burnout and is now the size of a chicken, only vaguely bitter about it. Unshaken, but self-preserved. Choosing contempt over aggression, for now

Bacteria in a humorless guy's butthole, one that randomly developed a sense of smell and now hates life