Real truth (enjoy my truth)
The whole "spectacle" of my life is all of the truth or the pursuit of it, which is the way it was since 2019 14 months ago when I was fancy and refined, exquisite, opulent, pompous and distinctive etc, with my philosophy gloomism which I invented for the truth and my whole reality from then was built specifically on these principles: that nothing past and future exists and therefore I didn't do anything in the past (the 'Buffalo '66' philosophy), that I'm a pessimist and this ugliness of reality prevails all in my life, that I'm rejecting other people's complications, living a simple life (it's brought peace to the table), that I'm beyond throwing a grenade when instead I want protection from risk, danger and peril, that it's a computer-generated reality which I may be a brain in a vat (yes), that I'm cold and logical, and so forth, it just goes on and on, and it goes on and on challenging my existence, forcing me to change it, when I unchanged it back to the way my life is, not the way my life is not, so I'm through with lying, I never lied in the first place except when talking to Ken besides any lies to excessively few people prior to it, about no alcohol in the house, there was alcohol in the house and I got away scot-free. I call it a not normal pane of existence, that's exactly what it is because it has my own distinctive character with my own distinctive reality, reality is invented, you made it up in your own head.