She's ditching me and i have no idea what to do

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7 Comments

My best friend and I have been friends for more than ten years. We, well, used to tell each other everything and go everywhere together. A few months ago she got her boyfriend who I helped her snag and she's been a literal slave for him.
Seriously, going without him for a day is literal torture for her! She never talks to me unless it's about him, she only hangs out with me if he's not available, and what's worse is that she verbally abuses me when he's around! She'll point out my worst flaws, telling me: "You have so much blackheads!" "You have a zit right there! IT'S HUGE!" and so on. She even says it's a pain for her to deal with me right in front of me.
Sure, she used to tease me sometimes but it's gotten so bad. Whenever I need help she's never there or too busy to even bother with me but when she needs help I'm always there to be here shoulder to cry. Her mom's no help either. Ever since she got her boyfriend her mom confronted me about being single and told me that I NEEDED a boyfriend to be happy. She even chose out a boy who's been a creep to me since I turned sixteen.
Whenever I call my friends cellphone her mom's the one to pick up, telling me she's busy or with her boyfriend which I know is total bullshit since my friends not allowed to go anywhere without her phone.
I've stopped telling her anything because she repeated it to her boyfriend or her mom. Whenever I want to hang out it depends on if her boyfriends available or not.
We used to be advent role players on the internet, coming up with different scenes and characters to play as and now she blows me off whenever I ask if she'd like to rp (role play). She even blows me off when I want to try something new. Everything revolves around what she feels like and what she wants.
She wasn't like this before! I miss her so much but I can't confront her without her boyfriend being right there with her acting like every argument we get into is some free Dr. Phil show, nodding his fucking head like he knows everything!
I don't know what to do. Our friendship is rocky with her boyfriend being her center of the universe and her mom trying to manipulate me the way she wants.
I can't even talk to her because that's her moms way of punishing me for not following what she wants. I want to give up completely but I love her like a sister and don't want to lose her!
Whatever advice I can get will be enough for me, I've been talking to my parents and my therapist but some outside Intel will help a lot.

Voting Results
18% Normal
Based on 11 votes (2 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • mysistersshadow
    7 years ago

    No point in stressing about it just move on.

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  • The sailor is dead
    7 years ago

    Didnt read the whole thing but the insults she throws at you when around her boyfriend are enough for me to say, get away from this person, they are not your friend

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  • Ellenna
    7 years ago

    Sounds as if you've already lost her as a friend, so you have no alternative but to move on. Painful but part of life

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    • Jujudog
      7 years ago

      OK Ellenna, essentially correct, but that's just too easy.
      Our OP put alot into this relationship and has effectively gotten (and continues to get) a kick in the teeth. So no, I don't say just drop it.
      A question must be answered:
      1: does our OP have a modicum of self esteem, i.e. does our OP realise what he/she is worth?
      2: Assuming Q1 is affirmative, our OP should realise that he/she actually is in the position of strength with this whole situation. Here we have her/his friend pretending they are all that because they are now in a relationship, and they are trying to impress their suitor at any expense. What a ridiculous play. So make it expensive.
      3: Ditch this friend, he/she deserves it already. You are astute enough to forge other, more meaningful relationships, with real, decent people, who will appreciate what you have to give.

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  • JumpinBeans
    7 years ago

    I'm officially done with her. I stood up to her but she never listened so I will no longer be around her or her bf. She made it clear that she no longer wants me around so I'll respect that choice and respect myself enough to keep away. She's already blocked me on social media (funny I was going to block her first) and made no attempt to communicate. I'm done being her doormat and no longer wish to remain in the the friendship. Thank you again for everyone who has commented and sorry for the inconvenience.

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    • Ipooprainbows
      7 years ago

      I read your story and I'm really sorry that things turned out this way! :(
      I can empathize with you and I really hope one day your "friend" wakes up and realises what she's lost! She should be regretful & grateful to have had you in her life. I don't know what is wrong with people but it sounds like she's immature and has a lot of problems. Good luck to her when they break up which is inevitable.

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  • JumpinBeans
    7 years ago

    Thank you for your comments and I'm actually going to confront her Monday, without her boyfriend who I will be killing if he shows up (not really but I'll probably break his nose)

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