They say im homophobic

29% Normal
19 Comments

So these liberals tell me I dont like gay people because it annoys me when they prance around in pink tutu's at starbucks while I'm just trying to get a coffee. They act like huge assholes with the way they talk and they say "if we annoy you ur homophobic"

So I have decided I'm gonna grow a huge mustache and lift weights for 6 months so I can go into places like starbucks and say "TTHEEE HULKSTER NEEDS A TRIPLE EXPRESSO BECAUSE I NEED TO SMMMASH IT DOWN BROTHER. I NEED TO SMMASSHH BROTHER!!! GIVE ME THE STRONGEST EXPRESSO IN THE BUILDING BROTHER, GET READY FOR THE SMAASSSHHH". Then I take the expresso chug it in one second, burp as loud as I can, then flex my muscles while making wicked eye contact with the queers. When they tell me I'm being annoyed I say "YOU JUST DONT LIKE STRAIGHT PPL BROTHER!! THIS IS HOW STRAIGHT PEOPLE ACT BROTHER!! IM JUST HERE FOR THE SMASSSHHH"

Voting Results
29% Normal
Based on 17 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 19 )
  • DADNSCAL
    2 years ago

    So when did you first suspect that you had gay tendencies?

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  • LornaMae
    2 years ago

    No need to wait those 6 months. I have to break it to you that it's highly likely they already see you like that LMAO

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    • 1WeirdGuy
      2 years ago

      Theres a difference in profiling someone and them acting an ass to prove all doubt. Just because I see by their appearance they are low t soyboys doesnt mean they have to prance around in there and act obnoxiously stupid. Just because they see me as a redneck doesnt mean I come park in a parking spot with a horse and scream yeehaw in the building.

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      • LornaMae
        2 years ago

        Dude, you're the one profiling them as "annoying gays". They are just BEING, just EXISTING, happily, GAYLY, and you're the one thinking they are offending you. If you can't accept differences just make your own fucking fruity gay as hell Venti Mocha Frappuccino.

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  • [Old Memory]
    2 years ago

    Así que estes liberais dinme que non me gustan os homosexuais porque me molesta cando se lanzan en tutú rosa en starbucks mentres eu só intento tomar un café. Actúan coma uns enormes gilipollas coa súa forma de falar e din que "se te molestamos é homófobo"

    Así que decidín que vou cultivar un bigote enorme e levantar pesas durante 6 meses para poder ir a lugares como starbucks e dicir "TTHEEE HULKSTER NECESITA UN TRIPLE EXPRESSO PORQUE NECESITO DESMATALIZALO HERMANO. NECESITO HERMANO DE SMMASSHH. !! DÁME O EXPRESSO MÁIS FORTE DO IRMÁN DO EDIFICIO, PREPÁRATE PARA O SMAASSSHHH ". Entón collo o expreso chug it nun segundo, eructo o máis forte que podo e logo flexiono os músculos mentres estou facendo malos ollos cos queers. Cando me din que me molesta, digo "A TI NON GUSTAS O IRMÁN RECTO PPL !! ASÍ ACTÚAN AS PERSOAS RECTAS IRMÁN !! SÓ AQUÍ PARA O SMASSSHHH"

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  • donteatstuffoffthesidewalk
    2 years ago

    your fault weirdguy

    shoulda went to dunkin donuts

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    • litelander8
      2 years ago

      Ew. Dunkin’ Donuts is trash.

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      • donteatstuffoffthesidewalk
        2 years ago

        starbucks is flamboyant

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    • LornaMae
      2 years ago

      You think gay cops don't eat donuts too?

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      • donteatstuffoffthesidewalk
        2 years ago

        i figure they eat krullers instead

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    • 1WeirdGuy
      2 years ago

      today I drank whiskey inside of a real slave cabin from the 1800s. Totally different crowd there

      Naw no one was there but I did drink whiskey. They dont build houses like they use to it was still in good shape.

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  • Cuntsiclestick
    2 years ago

    There's way too many Starbucks near my workplace. They're all ghostowns except for the one at Target.

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  • MonteMetcalfe
    2 years ago

    What if they break down and shriek "Take me now you savage brute" while pounding on your pecs?

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  • litelander8
    2 years ago

    Honestly, all this did was make me want Starbucks. And I really don’t care about who else is in their.

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    • SwickDinging
      2 years ago

      Me too. There is another post about Starbucks. Marketing ploy...

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      • litelander8
        2 years ago

        It worked. I went and got the goods.

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        • SwickDinging
          2 years ago

          I went to a different coffee shop. There isn't a Starbucks near me :(

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  • BleedingPain
    2 years ago

    Quick question. Whats wrong with the color pink? Will having a dude be near it turn him into a sea monster or something? Are people really afraid of a fucking color? You dont see women wearing blue and parents having a cow thinking that their beautiful daughter is all of a sudden a lesbian…

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  • [Old Memory]
    2 years ago

    This has to be a joke; if you got all hulked-up and made eye contact with me while doing your macho thing, I might not mind...

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