Update, turning wife from prude to slut

So I took the continue working on it option.
Big blow out discussion, and now we have officially agreed sex life is over between us.

She is not going to change and I can't give her what she wants, mentally or physically if it's just going to be an act of, "do me, and we can say we did it" or " I fulfilled my wifely duty" now go to sleep. When I'm up things just go down instantly with that attitude. More feelings if I just take care of things by hand.

To clean up a few misconceptions. Maybe I should have titled it turning wife back to slut. Years ago when we got married she was game for just about anything. Maybe not swap or swinging too much but between us everything was basically free game. She was even the instigator alot of times.
So now she says that was because she new I liked it but she never did. False pretenses, I fell in love and got married because I thought I had found, the perfect, friend, mom, wife, and sex toy all rolled into one.
Over the last 10 to 15 years she has gradually moved to being a prude and has come up with excuses why she did want to do certain things any longer. She has even quit taking care of her self, gaining weight, as well as personal hygiene. It kind of feels as if this is done to push me away. She'll lose the weight and I'll compliment her and want to play a little more and she'll quit the weight loss and gain it all back. Now I know the yo yo is a problem for alot of people but when you add it all together it just feels intentional.

For those of you that are hung up on the daughter relationship. Yes I have confided in her (as I said we are pretty close). She didn't have much hope that mom's mind was going to change although we both kind of agreed it would probably take a relationship to slowly develop between the wife and another female to get her to let loose again.
At our age I'm not sure what slowly develop means. It's pushing two years and I'm beginning to look for instant gratification. Not two or three more years down the road. It may be different if she was never a play toy to begin with. If our life had always been based on missionary style sex then I would agree I would not have a reason to expect something different at age 55 or after 30 years.

I really don't want a divorce, she is still my best friend and companion. However, I know if I go find something on the side that's the way she is going to take it and want to go.

Think I answered my own question. Suck it up. Sex is no longer going to be a part of my life. Anybody got some good suggestions to occupy my brain and body for a distraction purposes.