What do you do about a 'close talker'?

21 Comments

You know, those people who invade your personal space when they talk to you!!

It's the worst!! When it is happening, I never know what to do, I usually just turn away from them slightly and act distracted by something 'over there' or take small steps back but what I really want to do is tell them to backdafukup!!

Luckily I only know 2 people who are really bad about this but it's fucking horrible!! Where the fuck did they learn this from? How does someone have no concept of personal space? How has no one ever told them off before about it? You'd think after so many years of doing this SOMEONE would have told them off about it!! Can they not see my facial expression and body language that screams 'get back'??

What do you do when this happens to you?

I do nothing, it doesn't bother me. 5
I do nothing because I'm too scared to say or do anything. 5
I move away ever so slightly. 23
I tell them to backdafukup! 3
I pretend I have a bad disease and they need to stay back. 0
I get right back up in their face to see how they like it. 1
I start barking like a dog. 1
Other tactic (comment) 4
Hey, pal, I'M a close talker. I ain't backing up for nobody, fool! 2
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Comments ( 21 )
  • dappled
    11 years ago

    Depends on the person. My old boss used to do it and he had these really thick lenses on his glasses that made his eyes look like dinner plates. It was scary.

    I have another colleague who sneaks up behind you and puts his head on your shoulder so that you're cheek-to-cheek, then starts pressing the front of his body against the back of yours. He especially seems to like it if you're in a confined space and can't get away. I started deliberately stamping on his feet. One time I managed to back into him, and knock him over while still standing on his feet so he couldn't really correct himself. I don't know if the message ever got through but he works elsewhere now and I rarely see him.

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    • robbieforgotpw
      11 years ago

      You mentioned the boss looked like he had dinner plates for eyes. Kind of like the murmuring Milton on Office Space movie?

      That, that's my stapler...

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      • dappled
        11 years ago

        You know what? You are scarily close on this. Imagine Milton with ginger hair and that is *exactly* what he looked like. Different personality, though. He was ultra-religious, an army nut, and nobody ever dared take advantage of him. I once needed back-up from him and I don't know how he did it but he scared one of the higher-ups so badly that they virtually lost the power of speech.

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  • LunarFelis
    11 years ago

    I back up first, if they follow me I say something like, "whoa, ever heard of personal space?" and give 'em a little push. They get the hint.

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    • robbieforgotpw
      10 years ago

      Fart and they get the hint

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Spit on them.

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  • myownopinions
    11 years ago

    I try to slightly back up. What really sucks is when you back up and then they MOVE FORWARD. I just want to scream out, "Grah, take a hint and get out of my face".

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  • Francophile22
    11 years ago

    Some is cultural; in the Mediterranean countries people tend to talk closer and touch total strangers more.

    In Holland and some other northern countries they hardly gesture, touch or get close at all.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Tell them about Jesus.

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  • Shackleford96
    11 years ago

    Tell them that their breath smells.

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  • KeddersPrincess
    11 years ago

    Well, I'm not going to say this for everyone who talks closely, but a lot of people who suffer from autism or Asperger's syndrome have a tendency to talk closely to people because cannot decipher personal space. I know that it can be annoying, but not everyone is capable of understanding the "boundary line". I'd just try to back away from them without being offensive.

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  • robbieforgotpw
    11 years ago

    The offender may have gotten it from the close talker episode of Seinfeld. The actor's first name is Judd I believe (Reinhart?) Anyone know the actor's name?. He would only talk to people if his feet were touching the other person's and nose to nose with them.

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    • Carlton03
      7 years ago

      Hahaha yes yes it thought of that straight away Hahahah

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  • dirtybirdy
    11 years ago

    My reaction depends on whether or not I have I have an object suitable for stabbing on me or near enough to grab.

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  • MissB617
    11 years ago

    lol omg this whole thread cracks me up. I hate that too! Especially when their breath stinks! I was at work one day and a customer was standin way too close to me while talkin so I backed up slightly and he just came closer! Wtf!

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  • thanksforthefreecar
    11 years ago

    Back up very slowly, and hope they get the hint

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  • kelili
    11 years ago

    My father becomes a close-talker when he's drunk and it might be very embarassing but I usually find it funny. I don't know anybody who is a natural close-talker.

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  • Justsomejerk
    11 years ago

    Gain weight, lots of it.

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  • NotFloydzie
    11 years ago

    I do this all the time. I get all in your face like a crazy creep, but I always back up after a couple of seconds. People have done it to me and I back up, or jokingly say "Get away!" and laugh. But if you don't get away after a certain amount of time I will either slap or kick you. Or blame you for sexual harassment.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Maybe it's their culture?

    I really don't mind too much unless it's some creepy guy. Usually in those cases they do it on purpose and I'll back up. I think a few times I've held out my hand to stop them from coming closer to me.

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    • robbieforgotpw
      11 years ago

      HALT!

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