What should i do about this

I told my dad about my commitment to work hard so that my dad don't have to be the bread winner of the family any longer and can just relax at home. Fast forward a week, stuff happened and my dad dissed me about my commitment, about how can I give him time to relax when all I do is make trouble. I don't feel like living anymore, why am I even here?, I'm just taking up precious oxygen.