Is it normal that i'm always in my bedroom

24 Comments

Am I selfish because I have anxiety and Its hard for me to be around a lot of people and I feel funny when a certain person that I live with comes around like he scares me and I feel like something is going to happen so when it gets crowded or that person comes around I'll go to my roombecause thats where I feel safe at. Now the people that I'm staying with I over heard them talking to my husband they're trying to say that I'm selfish and that I don't love him and I'm not deserving of any love and then me and my husband have been together for 6 years now and he knows me and how bad my anxiety is but you're siding with them and then if I know someone has really bad anxiety issues I'm not gonna constantly all day it's like extremely loud and slamming and all kinds of wired noises all through out the day then my husband bust my door off the hindge so I can't close it and I have no privacy. Like I just feel like nobody loves me or cares and then that's not the half of it. What should I do

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Comments ( 24 )
  • YE
    2 years ago

    😂😂😂😂 Oh my.. your husband is being unreasonable, you're living in an atmosphere of irritating domesticity, my advice is that you leave that environment and find yourself a peaceful place where you're able to live on your own, (if you can afford it).

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    • CalliesFinest29
      1 year ago

      Thank you. Have been searching but not seeming to have any good luck. Everything to expensive and out of my budget

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      • RoseIsabella
        1 year ago

        Can you contact your parents for help?

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    • CalliesFinest29
      2 years ago

      I'm trying to I can't do this anymore then they tear up my room right after I've cleaned it and a whole bunch more shit

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      • YE
        2 years ago

        I'm really sorry about your situation, but I don't see any other immediate solution other than leaving that environment.

        I was once in some shitty situation with my overbearing and toxic family members, then I hit the eject button. I packed my bags, left in the middle of the night, travelled to a foreign country, no contact with any of them for a full seven years. And it made me feel better.

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        • CalliesFinest29
          1 year ago

          Yeah I'm about to and my husband I think is cheating on me and don't give a shit about me he leaves me in the bedroom all day everyday while he is in the living room with other females all day, talking about me saying rude and negative things. And then comes in my room when its like three or 4 in the morning and wants to fuck me and that's getting rare and slimmer or he either gos to sleep

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  • Taiahishere2
    2 years ago

    Listen, life is so hard we all have our challenges and our battles I literally feel you I have anxiety too it’s hard for me to get a job because when I’m in an interview I feel like I’m screwing up my words and I’m just very shy to do a lot of things and when all of my family is at my house it’s just too much noise and too much for me to be around so I just stay in my room. And it sucks because then when I do come out they make smart remarks like ” oh she’s alive“ or “omg who are you” and act like I’m a literal stranger and it’s sucks but I’ve always been shy and a big introvert and they all know this but don’t understand. Just know there’s people who do understand tho. And I would say that if you’re that uncomfortable you should get out of that environment with or without your husband because you need to focus on you and your Health.

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    • RoseIsabella
      2 years ago

      I think she should leave her husband, because he obviously doesn't have her best interest at heart.

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      • CalliesFinest29
        1 year ago

        I'm starting to feel that way to 😞

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        • RoseIsabella
          1 year ago

          Taking the door off the hinges is a form of abuse, because it deprived you of your privacy! Everyone needs privacy! Honestly, such extreme actions would probably make me lose my mind.

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  • kikilizzo
    2 years ago

    Probably not, but same. I have anxiety as well and I dont leave my bedroom much since the pandemic especially since I was looking for jobs after finishing my studies, but the pandemic pretty much put a stop to that.
    I get shit for staying in my bedroom all the time as well. People don't really get it. They think one oughta just skip outside and bask in the sun and sing and talk to strangers or whatever non-anxious people do.

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  • RoseIsabella
    2 years ago

    Taking the door off the hinges is a form of abuse.

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    • YE
      2 years ago

      Terrorism.

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      • RoseIsabella
        1 year ago

        Yes! It's torture!

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        • CalliesFinest29
          1 year ago

          Things just got worser. I have a really bad problem talking to myself in my room and now everybody repeating everything I be saying laughing at me and just being extremely loud I don't want to leave cause I love my husband and an addiction that I'm hooked on but I'm starting to get worried and scared that someone going to do something to me and then my NetSpend card came up missing that my money supposed to be coming to that my husband was supposed to be holding and was supposed to be in his coat pocket, just some wires shit going on around here whole coat came up missing now he says that he never told me that I'm just now realizing he lies alot and I just feel like he don't love me more. I wish there was some where I could go for peace and quiet. I just now realized nobody gives a shit about me

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          • RoseIsabella
            1 year ago

            Can you go back to your parents?

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    • darefu
      2 years ago

      I politely disagree with the door problem.

      I really dislike doors inside of a house or apartment. They allow people to hide, do things in secret, or escape addressing issues. They allow things to build up to pressure points of exploding. Ultimately being slammed or broken.

      I grew up where there were no interior doors and removed the ones in every house I've lived in since. Even my children kind of adopted the policy either the doors are off or they have an open door policy.

      I know, what about privacy? Well first I'm a naturalist and nudity is and has never been an issue. However, there has always been a curtain available in the bathrooms and bedroom doors. Seldom used but they're there.

      Now the reason I say politely disagree, is they are living with somebody. Don't know anything about that relationship, if it's family or not.

      It always better in a close living environment to iron out emotional issues than to go hide from them. They eventually will boil over. If they can't be solved then time to find your own place

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      • RoseIsabella
        2 years ago

        I live alone, and mostly I sleep with my bedroom door closed. The only reason I ever slept with the door open for nearly fifteen years is because I used to have a Siamese cat.

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        • darefu
          2 years ago

          I guess it is safer if you have a fire and more environmentally friendly if your rooms are individually climate controlled.
          I just don't like doors, I want to know what's going on in other parts of the house. I even position my bed so I can easily see out the door of the bedroom towards the rest of the house.

          Still missing your companion, you haven't got a new baby yet?

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          • RoseIsabella
            2 years ago

            Nope, no new kitty yet. Thanks for asking!

            Yeah, if I'm living alone with just a cat then I would be cool always leaving the door open for for the sake of the cat, but when I was staying with my folks next door, and sleeping in their guestroom it was too noisy! Also, I can't imagine living with other people, and not wanting peace, and quiet, or privacy sometimes, most of the time for me.

            I think people should be entitled to have privacy! I think it's inhumane, and abusive to expect someone else to be okay with having their door taken off the hinges. Yeah, sure, maybe some people feel like they don't need privacy, but it's unfair for them to push that on people sharing the same home. I would probably leave the boyfriend over that shit. I just love my privacy, and my serenity! It's better to be alone than with family like OP's boyfriend's family. I think they are bullying OP.

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            • darefu
              2 years ago

              I understand if you're living with someone that is not really part of your close family. When I spend time at someone else's house I respect their house rules or don't stay.

              I do understand the privacy issues if you want to read, get some work done, or just spend some time on the computer/pad. However I've never had a problem finding a place and kind of tuning out the rest of the world. I'll go outside on the balcony or to a park if all else fails. My bedrooms have never been the place I want to go to sit, most haven't been big enough for chairs and the rest of the furniture. I don't like sitting on the bed. I get on the bed I want to lie down and go to sleep or do other activities. Lol It's just not a comfortable place to sit for me.

              It just comes down to, I don't stay if I'm not comfortable. I've only had to live in shared space where I didn't have a choice a couple of times, college and national service, and we didn't get doors there, yes, between rooms but your room including the bath was shared with 2 to 4 others. You adapt and find a way to get privacy and respect others privacy.

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